Author event! Penn & Kim Holderness
[0:00]of zevis, it always feels so intimate,
[0:02]like we can have a real conversation
[0:04]and not have to just, you know,
[0:06]my dad was a sermon and it was a preacher
[0:08]and you know, sermons can be a little...
[0:10]One sided.
[0:11]A little one sided, so I wanna start by saying
[0:13]that we want you guys to be part of this conversation
[0:15]at the time you feel this.
[0:17]Yeah, I will say that we wrote a book called,
[0:20]ADHD is awesome, for example.
[0:23]And we came here, this is one of the stops
[0:28]to talk about the book.
[0:29]And there are so many inquisitive, curious kids in the crowd.
[0:34]One of them was here.
[0:35]One of them was the repeat.
[0:37]And the discussion, you know,
[0:40]it was a lot of grown-ups talking.
[0:42]And I would say one of the inspirations
[0:45]that we realized we needed to get something
[0:47]for kids out very quickly.
[0:49]So you guys were the reason we wrote this
[0:53]because we wanted kids to understand their brains
[0:57]a little bit better, knowing that their parents
[1:00]have this other book.
[1:02]So we were really excited to have the chance to do that.
[1:07]I think Penn, do you wanna read it?
[1:10]I would love to read the book.
[1:11]It would only take a few minutes.
[1:12]Are you guys okay with that?
[1:13]Can you make it work?
[1:14]Does anyone need one to look at?
[1:17]If not, Kim, can maybe turn the pages
[1:19]and I can tell you the teacher's finger.
[1:22]Yes.
[1:23]Or do you wanna do that?
[1:24]No, I'll just turn the pages.
[1:26]Okay.
[1:27]If I can figure that's high pressure.
[1:28]Sure, I think your receipt's in here.
[1:31]And there's a books of $100.
[1:33]I'm also, this is just a little trick for ADHD
[1:35]or you can do this.
[1:36]I'm just gonna take this off
[1:37]because it's easier to turn it.
[1:39]Because it's exactly the same, right?
[1:41]You guys are, that's your first rodeo, right?
[1:43]There you go.
[1:44]Okay, I'll do this.
[1:46]Yeah, all you can be with ADHD, Penn and Kim,
[1:49]olderness illustrated by Vin Vogel.
[1:51]Can't wait to tell you about Vin Vogel.
[1:53]He's the guy who drew the pictures here
[1:54]and he is fantastic.
[1:57]Hi there.
[1:58]We're up here in the tree.
[2:00]Just look for the sign that says ADHD.
[2:04]We've got a big clubhouse.
[2:05]We're pretty excited to have you around.
[2:08]Come on up, you're invited.
[2:11]Just high five the sharks,
[2:13]trampoline to the perch, rope swing past the ninjas.
[2:16]They're here sewing merch.
[2:18]Climb like that merch right there.
[2:20]Climb, climb through that branch,
[2:21]past the snake with the fiddle, then knock on the door.
[2:24]The password is this riddle.
[2:27]I am invisible.
[2:29]I rhyme with art.
[2:30]I start with an F.
[2:32]What am I?
[2:34]You have to say it.
[2:35]I can't turn the page until someone yells it.
[2:37]It has to be a kid.
[2:38]What are you doing?
[2:39]Yeah, that's a far thank you.
[2:40]Woo!
[2:41]I thought we were gonna have to stop.
[2:44]Thank you.
[2:45]You may enter.
[2:46]Did you like that adventure?
[2:47]This is our club and now you're a member.
[2:51]And here's a secret.
[2:52]If your brain's like ours,
[2:53]you don't know it yet,
[2:55]but you have secret powers.
[2:58]If your brain's like ours,
[3:00]you may be, sorry,
[3:01]if your brain's like ours,
[3:03]then you may be different.
[3:04]You may be fantastic.
[3:06]You may be vociferant.
[3:08]Go separate by the way,
[3:09]as someone or something that is noisy.
[3:12]If your brain's like ours,
[3:13]you're in the right tree.
[3:15]You're part of the same club you and me.
[3:17]And everyone else who has ADHD,
[3:20]there are millions of us in this pretty big tree.
[3:26]Turn your pages.
[3:27]Your brain is not broken.
[3:28]Not sure if you know this.
[3:30]You may have been bummed after your diagnosis.
[3:33]Look what it stands for.
[3:35]The name is so long.
[3:37]Those words made me feel like something was wrong.
[3:42]But I felt way better when someone told me
[3:45]that so many legends have ADHD.
[3:49]He makes the computers we use every day.
[3:51]Bill Gates says ADHD.
[3:53]Hooray.
[3:54]I'm never in that out loud.
[3:57]I guess I have to do it.
[4:00]Hooray.
[4:01]Yeah.
[4:02]The greatest gymnast that you'll ever see.
[4:05]Yes, Simone Biles has ADHD.
[4:08]Actors, geniuses, famous musicians,
[4:12]gold medal swimmers, and mathematicians.
[4:15]We did put Michael Phillips next to a shark there,
[4:17]but he's taken a selfie.
[4:19]Yeah, he's friends.
[4:19]So he's their friends.
[4:20]These are friendly sharks.
[4:21]Yes.
[4:23]They're part of our club.
[4:24]So now can you see all you can be with ADHD?
[4:29]Our club is so awesome.
[4:31]Let it be known.
[4:33]And now we're together, and you're not alone.
[4:38]Yes, it can be lonely.
[4:39]I've said to myself, why can't I be normal like everyone else?
[4:42]Sometimes we're squirmy.
[4:44]Sometimes we're forgetful.
[4:46]We interrupt friends.
[4:48]That makes us regretful.
[4:51]Sometimes we have trouble listening to a friend.
[4:54]We would space out on stories before they can end.
[4:57]When things go wrong, we can get really set.
[5:00]bad or really frustrated. And yes, even mad. What's normal to others, it's sometimes
[5:07]upsets us. And that can be lonely. Not everyone gets us. Do these sound familiar? These
[5:16]examples I gave? If you answer yes, you are so very brave. Yes, you're brave. You're
[5:27]brave. It's braver than getting haircuts in the dark. It's braver than feeding
[5:33]cupcakes to a shark. It's braved to admit that sometimes things are tough, but
[5:41]here's the good news. They're real, awesome stuff. Your brain is a source of great
[5:48]innovation. You have an amazing imagination. Your brain can be super spontaneous.
[5:54]Plus, no ones were creative or funny than us. Those times when you're struggling with
[6:00]concentration, you may be finding some true inspiration. Our brains can come up with ideas
[6:09]galore, ideas that no one has thought of before. There's more. When it comes to difficult
[6:14]problems, our brains come up with new ways to solve them. We're very accepting. We don't
[6:21]hate or grudge. We don't hate or judge. We're often forgiving. We don't hold a grudge.
[6:28]Remember how I said that sometimes we're sad? We're also resilient and soon we'll be glad.
[6:38]It's one of the reasons we'd love to befriend you. We're also so loyal. We'll always
[6:44]defend you. Oh, yeah, did I mention we're finding outrageous? And we love to laugh and
[6:50]laughings contagious. Okay, that's our club. The club that we love. A club that exists
[7:00]in this tree high above. And now, hopefully, it's easy to see all you can be with ADHD.
[7:07]Yay. You did it. We did it. We did the whole thing. I will say real quick about the
[7:18]the book. There's because I am who I am. I made sure that in the back pages, that there
[7:25]is just like notes from us and for maybe parents or more advanced readers, some, you know,
[7:30]a section like make the most of your really cool brain, all that. And also some legends
[7:36]with ADHD. That was yeah. So it was kind of fun to go through and find some others that
[7:44]have this. Before we get to questions and such, what are some of the things we wanted
[7:50]to talk about in this book? The squirrel that you see is sort of, you know, he's our
[7:56]mascot. Sticking his head out right there. Yeah. And he's on your shirt and the earrings.
[8:03]So we actually are writing another book that'll come out this time next year. And the squirrel
[8:10]is sort of the main character. And it's a squeaky McGee. So it's got a name. Yeah, squeaky
[8:17]McGee. So it's been, it's been, well, I mean, eventually for daydreaming, we'd
[8:23]love to do like a more patine tween. And now we have to learn how to write for teens
[8:29]and tweens. So just six seven like I, yeah, we have to figure that out. That's a way
[8:40]to guarantee your kids will never say start saying it's right. But yeah, we wanted this
[8:44]to be a conversation. So if anybody has questions, especially the kiddos, we would love
[8:50]to chat with you. And if not, we can just keep talking. And if not, we can talk for
[8:57]that. It is tough being the first one to say something. I do understand that. I do understand
[9:02]that. And it definitely even has to be about ADHD, you know, we're just talking about bungee jumping
[9:06]over here. Did you guys have anything in the book that made you like say, whoa, that's me? Which one?
[9:16]Oh, they love it. But I saw you say you weren't squirmy. You're not squirmy.
[9:29]No, I am. This is forgetting. Yeah. I have like basically photographic. Well, so I'm sure
[9:38]you probably know this too. But having a photograph, a photograph memory for somebody
[9:45]ADHD is not uncommon. In particular, if it's something that you care about that really
[9:50]resonates with you, that where that kind of tuning fork goes off in your head that you
[9:55]really like it, we tend to be really efficient at remembering things that we really care
[9:59]about.
[10:00]So cool, thank you.
[10:05]That's so sweet.
[10:06]Thank you.
[10:07]Oh, by the way, will everyone say your name's out loud
[10:09]when you, yeah.
[10:13]You're in the school.
[10:14]You're in the school.
[10:15]Okay, get distracted.
[10:17]Yeah.
[10:18]But also you're kind of, I would see you as being
[10:21]a potential leader as well as in the squirrel
[10:24]as the leader of this ADHD group.
[10:26]I think I know about you, Haley.
[10:28]Yeah.
[10:29]That's very cool.
[10:32]Animal crackers.
[10:34]Oh, she, yeah, animal crackers had her hand up.
[10:36]Yeah, animal crackers had her hand up.
[10:38]There were a lot of bits of this
[10:42]that came from our original book.
[10:43]And I know I saw some of you when we put our first one out.
[10:46]This, yes, so that book is essentially,
[10:50]it's got three parts.
[10:50]It's got one part sort of explaining what's going on
[10:53]and letting you know that you're not alone.
[10:55]And then number two, part two was really about
[10:59]the emotional side of it and how to make it work
[11:01]in relationships.
[11:02]And then part three are these systems
[11:04]that you can put in place to help make the most out
[11:08]of your really cool brain.
[11:09]So this book is parts one and two, really, of that.
[11:13]And then the next book that comes out next year
[11:15]is going to be part three, a lot of different sort of hacks
[11:18]that we encourage, it's the same sort of rhyming scheme
[11:21]for children.
[11:21]So yeah, coming back for that one, right?
[11:24]If we go to the bear, yeah, I don't know.
[11:27]Yeah, honestly, the bear, you came pretty strong,
[11:29]but we got this entire side of the aisle,
[11:34]is from there, yes.
[11:35]I'm sorry, no, I'm just thinking about the finding
[11:38]that they're actually studying girls.
[11:39]Yeah, and they're finding the differences
[11:42]that like ADHD presents in girls and that's where I'm starting
[11:48]to go like, oh, maybe that's.
[11:51]And I just wondered if you use like, have both.
[11:54]Talk about that, or do you?
[11:55]Because I'm obviously, you have like,
[11:56]so, okay, so, so I, I've been in like therapy and I've always,
[12:07]they've always told me like, oh, you have anxiety,
[12:09]then I had a therapist recently go, you know,
[12:11]this is actually classic ADHD.
[12:14]And I'm like, no, I don't have ADHD.
[12:16]My husband has ADHD.
[12:20]And so I was like, I reject this, I don't believe you,
[12:23]because I mean, I, I have to get things done.
[12:25]I can't have ADHD.
[12:27]So, yeah, so when it's, it's hard stuff.
[12:31]And then I went to another, it's got tested again.
[12:34]Because you're in any grand one and you don't.
[12:36]I was like, well, that, yeah, so I was like, that's not right
[12:41]because I, I can't have it because if I have it,
[12:43]what are we going to do?
[12:45]And then, and so I took, and I went through it,
[12:48]around a testing again with somebody else,
[12:50]and it showed up like, like, what was the term?
[12:54]Like, they're a pudically significant or something.
[12:57]Like, yes, you, it because they were asked a lot
[13:00]of questions about childhood as well.
[13:02]And looking, I've been still, and then I went to the,
[13:06]like a brain scan, but neurofeedback, I'm telling you,
[13:09]I'm still, and it's the front two sections were like,
[13:13]lit up like a Christmas tree and they're like,
[13:15]that's attention and focus.
[13:17]And like, so, so I'm still working on it
[13:20]and still processing that.
[13:23]But all that to say that they, there's,
[13:28]there are a lot more studies on girls and women
[13:30]and then there used to be, and they're,
[13:33]but they're just now happening.
[13:35]So we're not going to know for several years
[13:37]by the time they're peer reviewed and all this stuff,
[13:40]we live in North Carolina in the Duke.
[13:43]Duke has a center for 80, 80, she girls, girls and women
[13:48]for girls and women.
[13:49]And they're just studying girls and women,
[13:51]but it's going, and they're, some of the studies
[13:53]are losing funding.
[13:54]And so they're trying to raise funding
[13:56]and a, but just a study of girls and women,
[13:59]it's going to be a while.
[14:01]But from what I have learned about my brain is,
[14:03]however, hyperactive the boys were in class,
[14:07]that was just what was happening in my brain.
[14:11]If I may, we just saw the reason why women
[14:14]are often not diagnosed with ADHD.
[14:17]Because what's going to happen if they are?
[14:20]Like there's like, you know, as far as moms are concerned.
[14:23]So of the studies that we know, women girls
[14:28]are three times less likely to be diagnosed
[14:30]with ADHD than boys.
[14:32]Their symptoms present themselves.
[14:34]You know all about this.
[14:35]As either hyperactive or inattentive.
[14:38]Most boys present as hyperactive.
[14:40]That is in claims site, right?
[14:42]And that's easy to diagnose.
[14:43]Yeah, girls, more often than not, are inattentive.
[14:48]And it's not because they have fewer symptoms.
[14:52]They internalize their difficulties way better than boys.
[14:56]Y'all are just tougher than us.
[14:57]We are.
[14:58]Sorry boys.
[14:59]We are.
[15:00]That's.
[15:00]Yeah, I mean that's just that's just the way it did it is and we can be tough from time to time
[15:05]So then those girls become women and they become moms and they become the de facto in a stereotypical traditional relationship
[15:14]They become the de facto executive functioner
[15:19]Exactly
[15:21]Yeah, and a lot of times their symptoms go unnoticed because
[15:26]They're taking care of everyone else
[15:28]And it can lead to and Mel Robbins uses the word shame a lot. She's really good at this
[15:36]Anyone who has any type of ADHD has felt some sort of shame at some point during their lives
[15:42]Because they don't understand what's going on so
[15:45]What we're doing and what you guys are now doing because you're here is helping people understand what ADHD is
[15:51]Getting that word out because understanding is the most important thing to eliminate shame that in belonging
[15:58]Yeah, so I'm doing whatever work. I'm supposed to be doing but
[16:04]I think it's really important that
[16:06]Now the conversations we're having are helping this generation of kids is just never I hope never gonna feel
[16:14]Shame or never never gonna feel a stigma like there's a whole generation of women
[16:19]That just will never know
[16:22]You know what was happening and I'm hoping that our girls and our boys just
[16:28]Never have to feel
[16:30]You know, it's they're different, but there's no disorder. There's no deficiency. That's just the brain works a little differently. It's pretty awesome
[16:41]Hello
[16:43]Oh
[16:58]When we're serious you you were late because you went back to get your glasses and they were on your head
[17:03]I'm just letting the live streamers know
[17:05]Because your glasses were on your head the entire time that is wonderful
[17:13]So
[17:15]Yeah
[17:17]He's pretty incredible. Yeah
[17:19]So
[17:21]I just want to thank you
[17:24]I was 42 years old when I was diagnosed with ADHD
[17:28]My brother
[17:31]Seven years old
[17:33]And when I told my mom
[17:35]During COVID-19, mom, did you know I have ADHD? She does you know your brother. Yes, I never had to worry about you
[17:42]That's it
[17:44]that mother
[17:46]To my younger brother
[17:49]I knew my mom my actual mom couldn't handle another kid with ADHD
[17:56]So when I was diagnosed
[17:58]And actually
[18:00]Look in yourself
[18:02]Oh, good. I
[18:05]Something they won't say yes or no
[18:08]Just because it could be forgetfulness
[18:11]Oh, got it
[18:18]Right, sure
[18:19]So I've been diagnosed
[18:21]My daughter
[18:23]was diagnosed with dyslexia
[18:26]They do
[18:28]That's right
[18:30]And now
[18:34]So you have a fun house
[18:36]Yeah
[18:42]Yeah
[18:50]Yeah
[18:52]Well, thank you
[18:54]Well, and I
[18:56]We tried to write that book and frame it for the ADHD brain to have all these like colors and stuff
[19:01]But still we know the ADHD brains. It's it's hard to
[19:04]Get through something like that. So I'm glad that the audio helped
[19:09]How has how has being died like getting that diagnosis
[19:14]Helped you
[19:17]I actually
[19:27]If you need something organized
[19:29]I am your girl
[19:31]Two weeks later. I'm on just some other way
[19:35]I can't
[19:37]Everybody's laughing
[19:39]Kim Kim caught caught me under this thing. It was on Facebook
[19:42]There is a Facebook page for people with ADHD with hobbies
[19:47]And it's just
[19:48]To trade the thing
[19:49]It's just a way to be done with it after two weeks
[19:52]They'll like ship it
[19:53]So like if you're into a library for hobby
[19:56]Yeah, it's like you're early to watercolors. It's been a month not anymore
[20:00]right. But one day you were driving them to their hobbies. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I have also I went
[20:24]all over the house looking for my phone and I was talking to my mom. I'm like, I cannot find
[20:29]my phone and she's like, babe, you're on your phone. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's Perry
[20:35]Metaposs. Yeah. Oh, it's gonna be awesome. But that's another thing that kind of muddies the
[20:42]water when you're trying to diagnose women because and that's why they ask questions about
[20:47]childhood, right? It has to be present in childhood as well as adulthood and in more than one
[20:52]facet of your life. So at work at home at school can't just be in one spot. So
[20:59]family that put it over to me as you're like, are you a procrastinator? Oh, my god. I finished my
[21:06]business for my masters to do the night before I will stay back. So who who who care who has ADHD
[21:13]is a procrastinator? Okay. Okay. I'll do it. I'm an entire one tip that it's like a project and I
[21:21]like 400 pages, but I like it like one week. And her dad is like, can can I uncheck this a little bit?
[21:28]Yeah, I was about to say it because you were super focused on it when you did it. Do you need
[21:33]do you need that? It's run a little bit. That challenge, right? So the ADHD brain has what's called
[21:42]an interest based nervous system. And we function at our highest when three things are present,
[21:49]something that is new or novel. So a book report would be something new that you've never seen
[21:53]before, right? Something challenging. And to your point, sometimes we have to make up a challenge
[22:00]to make it work. And I know it's frustrating for some people, but that is just part of our brain.
[22:05]And the third thing is something that's of personal interest.
[22:08]And not failing is a personal interest. I bet you wanted to get a good great. So here's here's
[22:12]one piece of advice I'm going to give you and everyone else here that has changed my life
[22:17]in procrastinating is I have started creating micro deadlines before actual deadlines.
[22:23]And I've done it enough that I like I kind of will mentally punish myself if I don't make the
[22:29]deadline. So your deadline in that situation someday might be you're going to finish that book
[22:37]the first day that you get it. So or so how Penn doesn't and how we've started to do it as a
[22:42]family is, okay, you have to read a 100 page book for school. Read today, read two pages. And
[22:49]chances are you'll read more than that. Not just read two pages, but you've got to read two pages
[22:53]in five minutes. Give yourself a deadline. Well, he gives a deadline. No, it helps me. It helps me.
[22:59]Yeah. And it's literally or some days when you know when you're feeling it, like you're just
[23:03]not feeling it and you've got to take to the bed. Sometimes it's just like open the book.
[23:09]Just open it. And then you're like, okay, well, I've opened the book. I'm right as well when I'm
[23:12]here. Okay, I'll read one page. And just that little hit of accomplishment of like getting there.
[23:19]I do the same thing with working out. Like, I'm just going to go to the gym and I'm only going to
[23:23]walk on the treadmill for seven minutes and then I can leave. So and then from there and I've been
[23:28]seven, I can do 10. And then I could, yeah, so micro deadlines are kind of how we beat
[23:34]a bit like this one just for a decade. Yeah, there we go.
[23:38]I didn't know how it did that. It's on the side of your shit.
[23:44]Why don't you hop in. Hey, why don't you hop on it to be the restroom or something?
[23:49]Got it. Okay. We're good. Fine. What else is on everyone's mind? Did you have your
[23:54]hit? Okay, sorry. I never did.
[24:02]Shakespeare's tough. Can I give you just one tip for Shakespeare? Have you gotten the rhythm
[24:10]of the I am a BIM big pentameter in your head? Are you musical at all? Yeah, I am.
[24:15]Okay, so that was one thing. I guess it helped me get through, but then most of the time I was
[24:20]just looking for the IAM big pentameter, but it goes da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da.
[24:28]Two households, both the like and dignity and fair Verona where we lay our scene.
[24:34]And when it became like a when it became like a jazz poem to me, it was a little bit easier to
[24:38]listen to. I don't know if that would help you. And it helps me and helps, it's helped my son and
[24:44]daughter. And if I'm sure it's not horrible and so reading and like just yeah, I mean it's
[24:52]but they also probably looked at like this bit and so half of it. So they'll do it's dual
[24:57]translated. So it's here's the Shakespearean.
[25:00]you're the English.
[25:01]And each of you, the math and English.
[25:03]Wait, Shakespeare and English, Shakespeare is English.
[25:05]No, that's like real talk.
[25:07]Oh, like, oh, like two kids.
[25:10]Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
[25:11]Yeah.
[25:12]Yeah.
[25:13]And there are some.
[25:14]Six of seven households, both of them, like yeah, exactly.
[25:17]Oh, that's really cool.
[25:18]Yeah, that's really cool.
[25:20]But Shakespeare is really hard.
[25:22]Shakespeare is really hard.
[25:24]And I can't believe this, like, I'm still teaching.
[25:26]So can I know back to the, like, of the phone and the glasses
[25:33]thing?
[25:34]Please.
[25:35]So my, well, I didn't miss this kind of similar,
[25:39]but my mom was looking for cheese.
[25:43]And she was like, where could they be?
[25:46]And then, because she looked everywhere,
[25:49]so she looked in the fridge.
[25:50]And they're there, we're on the top shelf.
[25:52]Do you know what she got first?
[25:54]Do you know why?
[25:55]Because she walked, so this is where, if we have lost keys.
[25:58]Fridge.
[25:59]The first place for this is a fridge.
[26:02]Do you know what?
[26:02]Yeah.
[26:03]You walk into the house and you're hungry.
[26:07]Yes.
[26:08]And what interrupts executive functioning more than anything?
[26:12]Hunger and food.
[26:14]So most of the time that you lose something, it's near food.
[26:18]In our house.
[26:19]It's near food.
[26:20]So we just look near food.
[26:21]And, you know, it's good to know about, like,
[26:24]your mom's working memory.
[26:25]So like, when she's reaching for, you know, the yogurt,
[26:29]the keys don't even exist anymore, right?
[26:32]It's she just wants the yogurt.
[26:33]So, yeah.
[26:34]Have, does anyone know the mixing board analogy from the book?
[26:38]There we go.
[26:40]OK, so those of you who don't know, ADHD brains
[26:44]are like a mixing board.
[26:46]Or just anyone's executive functioning
[26:48]is like a mixing board.
[26:49]It's like one of those boards and the back of an auditorium
[26:52]for a big theater show.
[26:53]And they have 800 lights that you that you dim up very slowly.
[26:56]So you've got like the pretty purple lights.
[26:58]And you've got the orange lights.
[27:00]You get the spot lights.
[27:00]And you bring them all up, you know, half, 10%, 50%.
[27:05]And it makes this beautiful, perfect composition of lighting
[27:08]because of little tiny increments in each one of those things.
[27:11]And all 20 of those lights can exist at the same time.
[27:14]That is a neurotypical brain.
[27:16]That's a normal brain that is able to multifunction
[27:19]and keep all of those things in their working memory.
[27:22]The ADHD brain, those dimmers are on-off switches.
[27:27]There's no halfway.
[27:28]And you can only turn on one at a time.
[27:31]Because as soon as you move on to something else,
[27:33]whatever else it is that you're working on
[27:35]has left your working memory, which is why we leave stuff
[27:39]everywhere.
[27:41]Yup.
[27:42]Did you get from the other room?
[27:43]I just went off my phone.
[27:45]And do you know how many guys have to call on my phone?
[27:48]Can you just do it?
[27:49]I told you.
[27:49]She's out of my mind.
[27:50]I'm glad you hear every day.
[27:53]I know.
[27:54]Because she told me.
[27:55]And I was like, my mom's supposed to leave.
[27:57]And she told you to leave.
[27:59]Yeah, it's your help.
[28:00]It takes a bill.
[28:00]By the way, I love that the kids are dominating this conversation.
[28:03]Because we aren't talking about a kid's book.
[28:05]And it makes me super happy that you guys are doing.
[28:06]But I also have to be here in front of moms.
[28:08]I have friends that I was telling those
[28:12]20 years today.
[28:13]And I told her for like over 10 years.
[28:15]And I was like, you know, you know,
[28:16]because I have ADHD or whatever.
[28:18]And she's like, you do.
[28:21]You don't move around a lot or anything.
[28:23]I'm like, that's not what ADHD is.
[28:26]Not always.
[28:26]But it's like, how am I?
[28:28]I'm 45.
[28:29]So how do I give the talk here to actually list this?
[28:32]So if, first of all, we know there's a mental health
[28:36]crisis in our country.
[28:37]And if you try to make an appointment with a mental health
[28:39]like a therapist, this is why it's like taking me forever.
[28:42]It's, you know, months long.
[28:43]Right.
[28:44]But if it's a pretty straightforward case,
[28:46]if you're a kid, a pediatrician,
[28:47]can make a diagnosis if it's pretty straightforward.
[28:49]And as adult, a primary care provider should have access
[28:53]to they have these questionnaires
[28:56]that you basically are filling out and can do a medical
[29:00]health history and should be able to make an educated
[29:05]diagnosis.
[29:07]If, you know, there are, you can do, there's all,
[29:11]you can go, my kids, I had them on do this
[29:14]like two to three day test because we live in a college
[29:17]town, the universities did, they did like three days.
[29:19]They hated it.
[29:20]It was awful.
[29:21]But if, especially if a friend or yourself feels like they
[29:26]need to help immediately, a primary care physician
[29:29]should be able to do that.
[29:32]And books like this certainly don't diagnose people,
[29:34]but sometimes they ask good questions to kind of get
[29:37]people in the door.
[29:38]Yeah.
[29:39]So we have seven kids.
[29:40]So we have one, we have two classes of them.
[29:43]OK.
[29:43]And I have a ten-year-old here who is showing sign with ADHD.
[29:48]And some of them are like, if they dance together, yeah.
[29:52]Yeah, they get a lot of things.
[29:53]It's been our family.
[29:54]Yeah.
[29:55]You know, look out on the free one.
[29:56]So we're going to have to do that.
[29:59]But you know, it.
[30:00]it is interesting, we've learned so much about ADHD
[30:02]and we have one of the things we've learned is
[30:04]it dances well with autism anxiety, dyslexia.
[30:08]It's a long, a lot of them.
[30:11]In fact, the type print we picked is supposed to be work.
[30:16]It's like one of the best hit prints for dyslexia.
[30:19]And so, which I just thought was,
[30:21]I really wanted something super fancy and artistic
[30:24]and they're like, absolutely not.
[30:25]Because they're gonna have dyslexic kids trying to read this book.
[30:29]We looked at the possibility of doing the
[30:31]bionic words as well.
[30:32]Have you guys heard of those before if you have trouble reading?
[30:34]Yeah, and it like holds different things.
[30:36]It holds the first three letters of every word.
[30:39]And that sometimes works for ADHD dyslexia, all kinds of stuff.
[30:43]So, yeah, but that's 13 years ago,
[30:46]I think it's a nightmare, it's a nightmare.
[30:48]It's a nightmare, it's a scary talk, it's just business.
[30:51]I'm so sorry, there's something going on.
[30:55]So, by the time you use 13,
[30:57]you get out of the street or something wrong with it.
[30:59]It was so hard to walk with it.
[31:01]He's not a 19, he's a self, but it's still hard.
[31:04]Yeah.
[31:05]And then like, this one here, he doesn't understand it.
[31:09]Oh, so let's answer your book on audio books.
[31:12]Yes, it is, because you understand why I do this.
[31:14]Zach, right, do you like hearing this about you
[31:16]while you're back there?
[31:17]No, it doesn't matter.
[31:18]Oh, okay, so I thought you were gonna say,
[31:20]oh, I didn't realize it was, my bad, okay.
[31:23]But, let me tell you what, I was like,
[31:27]he is you, and I, and we, we're gonna make sense.
[31:31]But he doesn't normal, I found someone to stand me.
[31:35]But I feel like it's even harder,
[31:37]not that it's not hard for a grown man,
[31:40]but I think it's harder for women,
[31:41]and it's probably really hard for a woman with seven kids
[31:44]to have to spend all those plates.
[31:47]So, good for you for getting here,
[31:50]for getting here.
[31:51]I mean, just you're doing great.
[31:52]You're doing great, and thank you for being here.
[31:55]I want to say thank you for all that you do.
[31:59]I saw you speak to the National ADHD Convention
[32:01]in Anaheim.
[32:02]Oh, Chad.
[32:03]Yes.
[32:04]Yeah, cool.
[32:04]I'm a high school special education teacher.
[32:06]Great.
[32:07]And so, I was with a lot of kids, with ADHD,
[32:11]and all with ADHD, two dollars,
[32:12]with ADHD, and a wife with ADHD.
[32:14]So, I'm a very neuro-spicy.
[32:16]I've only had probably three dollars to pay for this.
[32:19]Three dollars for the ADHD.
[32:21]I was mine.
[32:25]But at that convention, it was really inspiring.
[32:30]Hearing you, your keynote,
[32:32]and then going to all the different speakers
[32:35]and learning about all the different things.
[32:38]So, I'm pursuing my ADHD coaching.
[32:40]That's fantastic.
[32:41]That's fantastic.
[32:42]So, I'd appreciate all you do
[32:44]to kind of destigmatize it to, you know,
[32:47]how do you do it?
[32:49]Your voice, I think it's,
[32:52]but I can hear it so clearly.
[32:53]I'm here for it.
[32:54]Yeah.
[32:55]Yeah, I think it's fantastic
[32:57]because you have a lot of time,
[32:59]so right here about when we were young
[33:02]and we were ADHD, which is like,
[33:04]here's some pills and...
[33:06]If you got that, maybe I'll see you in your favor.
[33:08]Yeah, but yeah, it's a hundred games, yeah.
[33:10]So, well, we talked about that a ton at Chad.
[33:13]And thank you for bringing it up.
[33:14]There's a lot of coaches at Chad,
[33:16]and they are very important
[33:18]in the long-term success of people with ADHD.
[33:22]You were talking about the pills in the 90s
[33:24]when I got diagnosed.
[33:25]It was the medical model, right?
[33:27]And they still kind of do it a little bit this way,
[33:29]but that's...
[33:29]Right.
[33:30]Yeah.
[33:31]But it was, hey, Penn, yeah.
[33:33]You're, you got a pretty flaming case of ADHD.
[33:37]Here's some pills.
[33:39]Good luck.
[33:39]I'll see you in six months.
[33:41]And nothing about the maintenance
[33:44]that really should be done
[33:45]when you have this type of brain.
[33:46]So, there's medication and there's behavioral interventions.
[33:51]Not everyone uses medication.
[33:54]If you do great, I don't.
[33:56]I feel like my creativity works best
[33:59]when my attention is completely unfettered
[34:01]and goes all over the place.
[34:02]But if I'm not going to use medicine,
[34:04]or even if you are going to use medicine,
[34:06]you've got to do work on putting some systems in place
[34:09]for your brain, whether or not you're on medication.
[34:11]That's what coaches are for.
[34:13]That's what they're fantastic at.
[34:14]It's really like working with individuals
[34:16]on your specific type of ADHD,
[34:19]because we're all different.
[34:21]ADHD's very ADHD, right?
[34:24]And then putting these systems in place
[34:27]that are attainable upstream, sometimes fun,
[34:29]for people who need that sort of thing,
[34:31]and really make the most of what your strengths are.
[34:34]So, awesome that you're doing this for a living.
[34:36]And I can't say enough about ADHD coaches.
[34:39]Thanks, Bob.
[34:40]I've been starting with, I think my...
[34:42]Did you know that the military has sort of some issues
[34:44]about your diagnosis?
[34:47]ADHD, you can't be on medication or have like the index.
[34:53]So, you'll notice my name, so I'm a share.
[34:56]My son always ever wanted this to be a military,
[34:58]so we just...
[35:00]But basically I'm hoping that like his school testing like doesn't somehow
[35:09]dramatically diagnose as my own right, but I just knew that had come up in your
[35:14]research and like thoughts on it and kind of wow I think like the thing he can
[35:19]hyper focus on is like something he's militant like he that's always one
[35:23]I'm pretty sure most drone pilots have ADHD, but like we'll get back to that
[35:27]like I just think like it's kind of I'm like really how many especially boys
[35:32]are we ruling out that I have never heard that for a box because like you know
[35:38]and we all kind of like you know that right so there's a box that says do you
[35:42]have ADHD or do you have any sort of like in the check boxes of like I got it
[35:47]and they probably had a lot of other stuff too but ADHD was on the list okay
[35:52]yeah it can potentially eliminate you from survey or if I don't okay we
[36:00]have that yeah I'm glad this is the discussion
[36:22]you said that you've had troops are these people that were like under your
[36:28]command or these people okay okay and I bet you they did a great job I'm assuming
[36:35]they did yeah that's my next question like did you see any
[36:41]every person I ever it's different right
[36:51]so just like trying to figure out
[36:56]first your choice right let's make it help them you should be better at whatever
[37:00]that we're doing um that's that's my job
[37:05]sometimes I have to be afraid of what that person
[37:08]right um yeah you sound like such a good yeah I'm sorry I wish we all had
[37:16]bosses like that they found out like what makes this tick yeah
[37:20]I have one of these guys
[37:23]that came home with it so this time of the ADHD we have this we have that
[37:28]and I'll give you pointers on how to treat him because that's when I you know
[37:33]if you totally relate to him why he's doing it so he's not doing it to to be
[37:38]disrespectful to be like disrespectful to your reparations his brain can't
[37:42]function like that so you have to do this and like no little tips and tricks
[37:47]right for you maybe like one more question and then I think we're gonna
[37:52]like take some pictures and signs and books and stuff if I know okay yeah
[37:56]okay um I think like um I think if I guess until I was like
[38:02]kind of with ADHD but I also got diagnosed with autism when I was 14 and I
[38:07]want to be an autism and ADHD psychologist when I hold it for
[38:10]on my own tricks because I don't have how hard it is
[38:13]being I want to because most of it I just really high for
[38:16]for free and like no there's no resources for teenagers
[38:21]those none yeah well how lucky are those kids gonna be
[38:26]I'm so glad you're doing that it's so special you're gonna be so good at that
[38:29]I can tell well thank you all this was really cool this was a great
[38:34]conversation for a bunch of ADHD or sitting still
[38:38]right I think we talked about maybe next year when we if we have this next
[38:41]book that we're gonna give everybody fidget toys
[38:44]and then maybe like bouncy seats or something yeah and maybe we're maybe
[38:48]all standing up but um we'd love to take a few pictures if you guys want
[38:52]them and sign a few books if you have them so
[38:54]they'll be okay okay great
[38:57]I just want to say thank you
[38:58]thank you
[39:03]thank you so I can tell this much of gift to have a
[39:06]safe space you guys have a lot of questions and
[39:09]I wish we could have these and we'll all do the last words
[39:11]as long as you pick it up and you see that's our
[39:15]dream is that's so my my cousin's a second great teacher and she
[39:19]read it to her class today and she said it brought up such a good
[39:22]conversation for the kids that don't have ADHD
[39:24]for everybody brought up so so now like oh that's why
[39:29]he's like having his like movement breaks and all this and so just help
[39:33]them understand their friends better
[39:36]so maybe our parents too like it's a good brought this home
[39:39]at night sparked something in the parent like oh
[39:41]that's me true yeah yeah
[39:43]anyhow so yes we have more books if you want to
[39:47]pick one up if you don't already have one they can sign them take pictures
[39:50]and thank you again thank you