Lisa Cheek, SIT, CINDERELLA, SIT: A Mostly True Memoir
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[0:45]Lisa Cheek is the author of Sit Cinderella Sit, a mostly true memoir.
[0:49]By the way, Lisa has come on every single Zibi retreat that we have had and comes to Zibi's
[0:54]bookshop all the time, her pink hair sets her apart, and she is a fan favorite among
[1:00]everybody.
[1:01]So I am beyond thrilled to support her work here, and Lisa, I am just a fan of yours
[1:06]as a person.
[1:08]Lisa Cheek is a writer and film editor.
[1:11]After 25 years of editing and producing other people's work, she finally took the advice
[1:15]of friends and co-workers to heart and decided to focus on telling her own stories.
[1:20]She lives in Los Angeles with her husband too much, Josie and Elvis Bruce Wayne and
[1:24]two cats are the kitten and Trixie, the frequent traveler to all kinds of interesting places.
[1:29]She has several film and television scripts in various stages of development, and is working
[1:33]on her next book.
[1:34]Welcome, Lisa.
[1:35]Thanks for coming on to talk about Sit Cinderella Sit, a mostly true memoir.
[1:40]Congratulations.
[1:41]Oh, thank you, Zibi.
[1:42]I'm so happy to be here.
[1:43]It's such an honor.
[1:44]Thank you.
[1:45]Oh, well, for those listening, Lisa has come on what every retreat we've done, almost
[1:49]every everyone.
[1:50]I try.
[1:51]They're so spectacular, and I have the best time ever, Zibi.
[1:54]It's just such a great thing.
[1:56]Like I said earlier, it's the best party I go to.
[1:58]Oh, and love seeing you in our bookstore all the time and seeing your book as it's, you
[2:03]know, I have this book is coming out.
[2:04]I'm going to, you know, and then here's the cover and here it is, and it's been fun to
[2:07]watch.
[2:08]So thanks to her, including me in this whole, this whole process.
[2:12]Tell listeners what your book is about, please.
[2:14]My book is about four months of my life.
[2:16]When I was about 45, I was taught, I'd been in TV commercials for about 25 years, editing.
[2:22]It was a great life, I loved, I loved editing TV commercials, it was so fun.
[2:27]And, you know, they want the young hip kids.
[2:30]And so I was basically told that I had aged out of commercials and found myself without
[2:33]a job.
[2:34]But can I actually just read that chapter, like the first, the beginning of that chapter,
[2:38]I loved how you describe this, is that okay?
[2:41]Sure, I love that.
[2:42]You said, I'd turned 45 that year.
[2:44]The age they put you in an old folks home in the ad business.
[2:48]One is long in the tooth, once she hits 40 in Hollywood.
[2:51]And I was not only over 40, but I was also a woman cutting TV commercials, like spotting
[2:55]an albino mountain gorilla riding a polar bear while eating a pineapple on a safari in
[3:01]the Serengeti.
[3:02]There just weren't that many of us.
[3:04]I'm sorry, I love that line.
[3:07]Okay, you guys.
[3:08]Thank you.
[3:09]Thank you.
[3:10]I love it.
[3:11]People keep asking me for quotes and I don't have any and I'm going to pull that one.
[3:13]Now you just gave me one thing.
[3:15]But so anyway, like everybody in Hollywood, you meet people and lots of directors get
[3:20]their starts in commercials, they're ready from David Fincher to Michael Bay.
[3:25]They all started in commercials, you know, so they all have these projects that they want
[3:29]to do.
[3:30]You know, you always hear and you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, great.
[3:32]You know, let me know when it happens, right?
[3:34]Because we all think it's never going to happen because it's so hard to make a movie.
[3:38]It's just so crazy.
[3:40]So sure enough, luckily, you know, this guy that I had been working with before, this
[3:44]director, I had moved to China and had found some documents that he thought were the original
[3:51]telling of the Cinderella story, it was a Cinderella story of some type, first, you
[3:56]know, earliest version he could find.
[3:58]And he adopted two little Chinese girls and so it was very special to him to tell this
[4:03]story about a little girl and to tell it in Chinese and he mandarin, really, let's
[4:12]say it was mandarin because I didn't speak a word of it.
[4:15]So I wind up taking the job needless to say and I wind up going to Yunnan along the Tibetan
[4:21]border with entire Chinese crew who didn't speak a word of English and I didn't speak
[4:26]Mandarin.
[4:27]You know, I learned Nihao and I, you know, hello and I learned Shishay.
[4:33]But that was a pleasure.
[4:34]What does Shishay mean?
[4:35]Shishay means thank you, hello and thank you, the two polite things.
[4:40]And yeah, and then I wind up living with 14 men who were the camera crew who didn't speak
[4:45]a word of English and, you know, we're working nonstop.
[4:49]You know, it's 19 hour days, whatever, while everybody's shooting on the set.
[4:53]And it was truly, it's funny.
[4:54]You know, most movies and they're not very good.
[4:57]You know, if you take a movie, you do it for the people or for the experience and,
[5:03]you know, I was certainly was never lucky enough to be asked to work on an Academy Award
[5:08]movie.
[5:09]But I'm just saying for me, when I heard about it, I thought this is going to be an
[5:13]adventure of a lifetime, right?
[5:15]I just, but I had no idea what kind of adventure was going to be.
[5:18]And I certainly didn't think I was going to be writing a book about it.
[5:22]And did you take notes, like how did you, no, you just remembered it all.
[5:27]Well, I had just gotten Facebook had just started to happen in 2009.
[5:33]And so that was it, you know, I would post on Facebook that was kind of my journal.
[5:38]That was my, you know, my diary of what was happening.
[5:42]So I posted photos.
[5:44]So how, what is the short version of how you navigated this?
[5:48]How can anyone navigate a situation in which they feel completely overwhelmed and
[5:53]ill-equipped?
[5:54]Well, I think I had to let go.
[5:58]And I just had to be present because, you know, things would break down.
[6:03]Stuff wouldn't happen.
[6:04]They wouldn't be able to shoot.
[6:06]They got shut down one day because the costumes looked too debut.
[6:09]And I mean, it was like always something crazy going on.
[6:12]And yet it was in a language I didn't speak.
[6:14]So that made it even more crazy.
[6:15]So I didn't really know what was going on.
[6:19]But it was on top of it being a Cinderella story, which is, you know,
[6:24]I don't know about you.
[6:25]But as a little girl, the Disney one, that's what I heard.
[6:27]And that's, you know, yeah, of course.
[6:30]So, and this one actually is a little, it's definitely not being saved by the man.
[6:35]She basically saves, she saves him, which is really cool.
[6:40]This is a different way of, you know, seeing life and seeing, you know,
[6:43]a story in that she's the one who saves things, makes the world a better place and
[6:49]love it and talk about the role of dogs in the book.
[6:52]Oh, I know, one of the reasons I have to tell you, I love your book stories.
[6:56]It's like five blocks from where I met Ron Howard.
[6:59]And I would be used to like, I just love it.
[7:01]Your whole, my whole, my whole book opens right where your location is.
[7:06]And it's just so magical to me that area.
[7:08]And yeah, I got my first adult dog when I was about 40.
[7:12]And I took him everywhere with me.
[7:14]He went to work with me.
[7:16]He paid them more into one month.
[7:17]He, you know, he was in commercial.
[7:19]My clients would come in and they'd be like, oh, he's so great.
[7:21]Let's put him in the commercial.
[7:23]So yeah, he was my best buddy.
[7:25]He really was.
[7:26]And of course, I had to, I had to, you know, find somebody who would look after him.
[7:31]While I was gone, because in the book, I just tell you about three months.
[7:34]But technically I was gone for six.
[7:36]The other three months I was in Hong Kong, you know, just kind of like a modern city.
[7:41]There's a 7-Eleven in a Chanel on every corner there, though.
[7:45]It didn't feel like it needed to be told, but so I was gone a long time.
[7:51]And he truly was, was my best friend.
[7:53]And I just think dogs, I think every home needs to have a dog.
[7:56]I think they are just so magical.
[8:02]They're, they're creatures that teach me patience and love and unconditional love.
[8:07]and they love me when I smell bad and it felt look pretty.
[8:11]And you know, it's just, there's nothing better than a dog.
[8:15]My dog, actually, where did she get?
[8:17]Oh, she's on the floor next to the couch.
[8:18]You can't even see her, but yeah, I know.
[8:21]It's, it's the love.
[8:22]It's like, she's so excited to see me in the morning.
[8:24]And she's so excited when I walk in the door, even though I just like ran downstairs and
[8:28]it's the sweetest.
[8:29]It is.
[8:30]There's nothing better.
[8:31]And I think, I think our lives would be a whole lot better if every home had a dog.
[8:35]I just think I learned so much from my dog of acceptance and like, yeah, you're, you're
[8:40]it.
[8:41]I'm going to, you know, you're here.
[8:42]I love the one that I'm with.
[8:44]You're it.
[8:45]So when did you know that your experience would be a book?
[8:52]So my father died and my father raised me mostly and my father died in 2018.
[9:00]So I went to go see his psychic, I went to go see this channel because I wanted to know
[9:04]how it was doing what was happening.
[9:06]My dad would read a book a day.
[9:07]He loved books, you know, he took me to movies when I was little, like that's where I got
[9:11]on my love of all of it.
[9:14]And so I went to find out to talk to my dad, which by the way, he says that heaven has
[9:19]the best library.
[9:20]Oh.
[9:21]Oh, yes.
[9:22]Yep.
[9:23]So I thought that was really cool that she told me that.
[9:25]And while I was there, she said you had this, she just came back from this adventure and
[9:28]you needed to tell the story because I was working on something.
[9:30]I was working on a novel.
[9:33]And she said, this is this is your story, you need to tell this story.
[9:37]And I originally wrote it as a novel, but it was just so magical and so sweet that
[9:43]I felt it needed to be owned, you know, I wanted people to know that that life is an
[9:49]adventure and that, you know, there's magic in there all the time and, you know, what other
[9:54]people think of me is none of my business and it's not always accurate, you know, so someone
[9:59]tells me I'm too old.
[10:00]Well, you know, I go to China, all these, you know,
[10:03]really old ladies are, you know, amazing, right?
[10:06]So there was so much learning for me to do
[10:09]and the main one was just kindness
[10:11]as the universal language, you know?
[10:13]It really is.
[10:14]So what did you get out of writing the book?
[10:17]Like after you put it aside and you're like,
[10:19]okay, yes, and now I'm gonna try to sell it fine.
[10:21]But like what did you get out of even writing the first draft?
[10:24]First draft was a mess.
[10:25]So, cause I really didn't know what I was doing
[10:29]and, you know, I was working with people
[10:32]who insisted it be a novel.
[10:34]And it really, once I got, you know,
[10:36]I've been trying to write for 20 years
[10:39]and, but as soon as I met the right editor,
[10:42]I met Amy Ferris and she, at a retreat, you know,
[10:46]and she loved my story and she spent nine months
[10:50]with me working on it.
[10:51]And then I said, I'd really like to see, you know,
[10:54]what brook thinks of this, my publisher,
[10:56]just to send it to her, she was not my publisher
[10:58]at the time, but I had known her.
[11:00]And I said, I'm hoping she'll give me some great feedback.
[11:03]And the feedback was I wanna publish.
[11:05]And so that that is getting back of all, right?
[11:08]So I didn't, I didn't move on because I thought,
[11:10]at this time I'm 62 now I need to like,
[11:13]I have so many other stories I wanna tell
[11:14]and I don't have time to pitch.
[11:16]So yeah, so it's really exciting.
[11:19]And I love brook.
[11:20]She's amazing, great, great publisher.
[11:23]I love being with her.
[11:24]She just taught me so much along with Amy.
[11:27]You know, it was just when the right person comes along,
[11:29]the right person comes along, right?
[11:31]Yeah, absolutely.
[11:33]Wait, can you tell me?
[11:34]I don't know much about like where you're from.
[11:37]I know your career prior to this
[11:39]because it's in your bio and everything,
[11:40]but tell me more about your growing up
[11:43]and like where you grew up and your family.
[11:45]And I'm sorry about the loss of your father
[11:47]that's terrible.
[11:48]Thank you.
[11:49]He was really fun.
[11:50]He was a great guy.
[11:51]But I grew up all over the place.
[11:53]I was born in Oakland.
[11:54]We moved to Coronado before there was a bridge.
[11:57]And then we moved to North Carolina
[11:59]and then we moved to Massachusetts
[12:01]and then we lived in Johannesburg, South Africa for a while
[12:04]and why all this moving?
[12:06]Well, my father wound up,
[12:08]I think he really wanted to be a spy,
[12:10]but that didn't happen.
[12:12]So he just wound up being an engineer
[12:15]or maybe or maybe he was a spy.
[12:16]Maybe he was, he could have been.
[12:18]But I know that that was his sort of first goal.
[12:21]And anyway, so he wound up working
[12:23]for an international company
[12:25]and they were there,
[12:26]mining for diamonds in Johannesburg for cutting materials.
[12:29]And then we moved back to Detroit.
[12:31]I lived in Detroit and then I lived back in North Carolina
[12:34]and then Charleston, South Carolina.
[12:37]I graduated from high school there
[12:38]and then college.
[12:39]I went to a small school called Winthrop
[12:41]in Rock Hill, South Carolina.
[12:43]And then I worked in broadcast for six years
[12:45]and little tiny stations.
[12:46]And that was my film career,
[12:49]was editing movies, watching three movies a day,
[12:52]taking out the swear words and nudity.
[12:55]So how do you feel like that sort of transient,
[13:02]transients of childhood affected you,
[13:05]especially now here you are writing about a travel situation
[13:08]which for most people like you hadn't traveled,
[13:11]which would be jarring and everything.
[13:13]But you have at least some sort of background in this.
[13:17]Oh, definitely.
[13:18]And my mother, where my parents got divorced,
[13:20]my mother moved to London.
[13:22]And when I was eight, nine, when I turned nine,
[13:25]she moved to London.
[13:26]And then she married a man who was in the oil business.
[13:29]So they lived all kinds of places,
[13:31]Turkey and Indonesia and Singapore.
[13:33]And so I would go and visit them.
[13:36]And then my father, too,
[13:38]and to almost a day died,
[13:39]I was supposed to go on this last trip with him.
[13:42]And he went to go, did the bus tour of the stands.
[13:47]So I just said, I don't think I can do that,
[13:49]daddy might back, I just think it's,
[13:50]but he was game.
[13:51]That was last trip he did.
[13:52]He'd been, I think it was like four or five countries
[13:54]he didn't get to go to.
[13:56]Oh my gosh.
[13:57]I know crazy, right?
[13:58]Yeah, that is crazy, huh?
[14:01]So what do you take away from this?
[14:05]Like, do you, like, I haven't been to that many different places.
[14:09]What do you take away about human nature?
[14:11]So to speak, I mean, I know you were a kid
[14:13]and this is a lofty question,
[14:14]but seeing all these cultures and even in your books,
[14:17]seeing this culture and being immersed in different worlds.
[14:22]What do you take away from all that?
[14:24]Well, you know, it's interesting
[14:25]because, you know, I moved every two or three years as a kid.
[14:28]So I continued to do that until I moved LA when I was 28.
[14:34]And after being here for five years,
[14:36]which was the longest I'd been anywhere,
[14:38]I got to move, I got to move, I'm moving to New York,
[14:39]I got to, and then somebody said,
[14:41]Lisa, maybe you should just get a therapist
[14:43]and just move your poor while, right?
[14:46]And learn that it's okay to stay in one place.
[14:49]And so now I've been here 34 years.
[14:52]Well, you have the same therapist, have you moved on?
[14:56]Like, well, actually, I've had a few.
[14:58]Let's just say I've had a few.
[15:00]Okay, and at what stage of your life
[15:04]did you die your hair pink?
[15:05]Oh, this has been something fabulous.
[15:08]I just, you know, during COVID, basically,
[15:12]you know, I wanted to be a platinum blonde.
[15:13]I always wanted to do that.
[15:15]And I just thought, you know,
[15:15]when COVID had her, I was like,
[15:16]what am I waiting for?
[15:18]What is this all about, right?
[15:21]And I became a platinum blonde, I was awful.
[15:24]I could not pull it off at all.
[15:25]I was like, this is, I don't know who is this person.
[15:29]So, and then I thought, the only other color
[15:31]I always said, if I ever lost my hair,
[15:32]was I was gonna go buy a pink wig.
[15:34]And I did, I went to my hair dressing,
[15:37]she was just gonna put some streaks in it.
[15:39]And I said, just go for it.
[15:42]And I got to tell you, it's like having a pet.
[15:45]I walk in a grocery store as young people talk to me.
[15:47]Everybody taught, I was not approachable
[15:49]when I was a blonde or whatever.
[15:52]Since I've become pink, all of a sudden,
[15:55]you know, everybody talks to me.
[15:56]It's like immediate conversation, just like a dog,
[15:59]like having a dog with me.
[16:01]It's like, I don't, people say,
[16:02]oh, I love your hair.
[16:03]Wow, I wish I could do that.
[16:04]Or, and I'm like, great, go do it, right?
[16:07]Cause it's, I feel like I was born this way now.
[16:11]Oh my gosh, I love it.
[16:13]It's better, it's better.
[16:15]And when did you sort of fall in love with reading?
[16:21]And when did that whole chain,
[16:24]whole passion come into your life in authors
[16:26]and wanting to be with authors and all that?
[16:28]Well, my parents were always like,
[16:30]you know, I was an only child for eight years
[16:32]until my sister came along.
[16:33]And then, so we were always a reading family.
[16:36]You went to bed with a book.
[16:38]And that's what you did every night.
[16:40]That's just how you went to sleep.
[16:41]And like I said, my dad would read a book a day.
[16:44]So, books were always, you know,
[16:47]I mean, the library he had was crazy.
[16:50]But then, you know, I, you know,
[16:51]I went into movies and I started working there
[16:53]and all of that and commercials.
[16:56]And it was really only, you know,
[16:58]in the last four or five years
[16:59]that I have had an opportunity to be around writers.
[17:03]It's just a whole new world.
[17:05]It's a whole another adventure.
[17:08]You know, it's almost like going to China
[17:09]because I have to learn all these things about publishing.
[17:12]And I had to, you know,
[17:14]it's just a whole new world is opening up.
[17:16]And I'm meeting the coolest people.
[17:18]And I love hanging out with readers,
[17:20]which is why I adore your retreats.
[17:22]It's just so much fun.
[17:23]I, every woman I meet there is interesting and fun.
[17:27]And it's just books they do.
[17:30]They bring us together.
[17:31]They, you know, it gives us something to talk about.
[17:33]Kind of like my dog that I keep telling everybody,
[17:35]I'm so grateful I have dogs.
[17:36]So my husband and I have something to talk about.
[17:39]because we don't read or watch the same television shows, right?
[17:42]We don't.
[17:43]We just do completely different things.
[17:44]And I'm like, I'm so grateful.
[17:45]My dogs get, you know, what,
[17:46]what do people talk about it?
[17:47]They don't talk about a dog in their homes.
[17:52]So yeah, I find that, I find that with readers.
[17:54]It's, I don't know.
[17:56]They're just, I can't wait to hear,
[17:58]because I think we all project our own stuff
[18:00]onto people's books when we read them.
[18:02]So I'm fascinated to hear what people, you know,
[18:06]because what I put on the pages
[18:07]and I learned so much as you write.
[18:09]You know, I, it's like, oh yeah, I learned this.
[18:12]And I learned, right?
[18:13]It's not until you really get into it
[18:15]that I could see, I knew it was magical.
[18:20]I knew it was an extraordinary time,
[18:23]but I didn't realize the lessons I had learned
[18:27]until I actually put them on the page.
[18:29]So what is one lesson you took out?
[18:33]Well, the big one is life as an adventure.
[18:35]You know, it really is, and to always be open
[18:38]to, you know, when one, as they say, one door closes,
[18:41]a window opens and you fly out of that, right?
[18:44]So that is the big one.
[18:47]Kindness is a universal language.
[18:49]I just, you know, I had so many experiences.
[18:52]There were people who were just so kind to me
[18:53]through a smile or through giving me something
[18:56]or something without saying a word, you know?
[19:00]And that was really lovely.
[19:01]And, you know, I had to learn to trust
[19:04]that what I needed was gonna be provided for.
[19:08]Because I think growing up, I didn't have that.
[19:11]So it was a real big experience for me to see how
[19:15]they showed up, not even speaking the same language,
[19:18]not like whatever, but they were there
[19:20]when I needed anybody.
[19:22]And that is amazing, amazing.
[19:25]Are you gonna send this book to everybody?
[19:29]Even though it's not in the right language?
[19:31]I will say my assistant.
[19:33]So I only changed, I changed everybody's name
[19:36]but mine and my assistant and his name is Max.
[19:39]And his father was in publishing in Hong Kong.
[19:41]And so I sent it to him on a Friday night
[19:45]and by Sunday morning he had read it.
[19:49]And he lives in Singapore now, by the way.
[19:52]And he left the most magical review on Goodreads.
[19:57]It's super sweet.
[19:58]This is our Max in the book.
[20:00]And it's just so lovely.
[20:02]And I don't know who knows where it'll go or what it's like.
[20:05]That's the other thing I've learned is it's like,
[20:08]you never know what's going to happen.
[20:09]Because I didn't have any thought of writing this, you know?
[20:15]But I am looking forward to the next few that I'm getting ready
[20:17]to be in that I'm working on now.
[20:19]The next few.
[20:20]No, my God, I do, right?
[20:22]So tell me the next few.
[20:24]Well, I've got two more memoirs that I'm working on right now.
[20:27]One is about one night of my life.
[20:30]And the others about 10 days of my life.
[20:32]I'm intrigued.
[20:34]You can't tell anything.
[20:35]Nothing more than that.
[20:36]That was quite a tease.
[20:38]Well, the first one, the one that I'm hoping
[20:40]out have finished by June is about getting married at 49.
[20:46]Is this the one next time?
[20:47]It was the first time.
[20:48]But I just want to say that.
[20:50]It was getting married for the first time at 49.
[20:53]But I didn't get married until when I came back from China,
[20:57]it was sort of like, I thought, well,
[20:58]I could probably do 25 years with somebody now.
[21:01]I could never do anything.
[21:02]Right?
[21:03]You know, when I was younger, I could go,
[21:04]I don't think I can live with you that long.
[21:06]That's too much time.
[21:08]But yeah, when I came back, I was like on the dating machine,
[21:11]I was like, I really want to try this out.
[21:13]I want to see what marriage is all about.
[21:15]What this, you know?
[21:16]So it's, yeah, sort of about my, it's not sort of,
[21:19]it's about the men I chose before I met my husband.
[21:24]And what happens?
[21:25]And you know, that's super sweet and funny.
[21:28]And yeah, I'm super excited about getting it out.
[21:32]Amazing.
[21:33]That sounds great and very hopeful.
[21:35]Thank you.
[21:36]Yes, amazing.
[21:38]Well, now that you're a published author,
[21:40]what advice do you have for aspiring authors?
[21:43]Oh, you know, just to keep writing and to go to,
[21:47]go where other writers are.
[21:49]It's such a lonely place.
[21:51]You know, when we're at home and we're in our head
[21:53]and we're, you know, and for me,
[21:55]I'm always in a writing class.
[21:57]I'm always going to retreat.
[21:59]So I'm going to conferences.
[22:01]I go wherever there's other people
[22:04]who can show and show me how to do it.
[22:06]Because I don't know how.
[22:08]I just know that being and being surrounded
[22:11]and in the middle is the best place to be, love it.
[22:15]Amazing.
[22:16]Well, Lisa, I am so excited for you.
[22:18]Congratulations.
[22:19]And yay, just a huge yay and a hug and bravo to you.
[22:25]Thank you.
[22:25]And thank you for Zigbee's bookshop.
[22:27]It's my most favorite bookstore ever.
[22:29]I just love it so much.
[22:31]You bring me so much joy.
[22:32]It's like, it's like cheers.
[22:33]For me, it's, you know, Zigbee's is cheers.
[22:35]I go and meet my girlfriends and hang out
[22:38]and it's just the, it's so fabulous.
[22:40]The experience I get to have there.
[22:42]Thank you.
[22:43]You're welcome.
[22:44]You're welcome.
[22:44]Okay.
[22:45]Bye, Lisa.
[22:46]Bye.
[22:47]Thank you for listening to Totally Booked with Zigbee
[22:50]formerly mom's don't have time to read books.
[22:52]If you loved the show, tell a friend,
[22:55]leave a review, follow me on Instagram at Zigbee Owens
[22:58]and spread the word.
[23:00]Thanks so much.
[23:01]Oh, and bye the books.