Jenifer Lewis, WALKING IN MY JOY: In These Streets
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[0:54]Jennifer Lewis is the author of Walking in my Joy in these streets
[1:02]Debbed a national treasure and a force to be reckoned with
[1:05]Award-winning actress Jennifer Lewis starred on ABC's blackish as the hilarious grandmother Ruby Johnson which earned her
[1:12]Annomination for the 2016 critics choice award
[1:15]She's appeared in over 400 episodic television shows
[1:18]68 movies 40 animations and four Broadway shows such as the Fresh Prince of Bel Air friends a different world
[1:26]20s cast away. What's love got to do with it? Think like a man. Medea's family reunion strong medicine
[1:32]The princess in the frog Mickey Mouse Funhouse Rugrats cars one two and three
[1:37]American dad and hairspray. She has performed in more than 200 concerts worldwide
[1:42]Including sold out audiences. It's Lincoln Center and an electrifying standing ovation at Carnegie Hall
[1:48]Her accomplishments as an entertainer community activist and author have been recognized with an honorary doctorate from her alma mater
[1:55]Webster University and the career achievement award from the American black film festival this year Miss Lewis will begin
[2:02]A new television series. I love that for you for showtime. She also received her star on the Hollywood walk of fame
[2:10]She was born and raised in Kidlock, Missouri and lives in Los Angeles with her dog Butters Lewis
[2:14]Welcome Jennifer. Thank you so much for coming on mom's don't have time to read books to discuss your
[2:20]amazing
[2:22]Love that name. Who named you?
[2:26]Friend and my play group when I was one could not pronounce Elizabeth and so she called me zibith and that my parent
[2:33]Oh my god, that is so cute. Oh my god. Get out of here. That's a great story
[2:40]Kids can pronounce
[2:42]Oh my god. Oh, I was so excited to talk to you today after reading your whole book, which I just loved and I
[2:51]Read the whole thing. I read the whole thing. Oh my god. No, she'd become on now. I did. I am telling you the truth
[2:58]No, I know you read it, but did you like it? I loved it. I loved it
[3:03]First of all, I loved that you wrote it in a way where it felt like I was talking to like I was just sitting and talking to you
[3:09]So by the time here we are. I feel like I already know you so well
[3:12]You don't know me. I guess but you know I feel like we have this relationship going already
[3:16]Oh my god, my god, my god when I read you interviewed Hillary
[3:22]And you I was like, okay
[3:26]At least I'm gonna be good. Yes. No, I'm all yours. And I'm excited to talk to you and
[3:33]Let's just do it. I'm on you. Let's do it. We're doing it. Glad I do like that everybody's saying that. They should. I'm not surprised
[3:40]I was one person out at one chapter. I am not surprised everyone's like it
[3:45]Put my heart in it. I really know and I got no secret. So take it kids. And I'm sitting on top of the world
[3:52]I got everything. I want it. Here it is. I'm ready for you
[3:58]Well, it's funny that you talk about Hillary and Jill Biden because I have not interviewed Barack or Michelle
[4:05]But I feel like Obama, but they are like all through your book your reverence
[4:11]From Michelle and you were so funny and you're seen with them when
[4:16]They were coming through the line and she's literally like basically pushing you away from from Barack
[4:23]So fun so fun. I told you I woke up they gave me three Christmas
[4:31]And then you painted to faint in the White House. I was like, I don't know anybody else's fainted the White House
[4:37]And I completely forgot
[4:41]Because you know because I usually go home and tell all the stories my best friend was diagnosed with cancer
[4:47]But they we got back. So I forgot all about the faint
[4:51]All about it until I was writing the book
[4:55]And I
[4:58]Had a storyboard on the wall and I had to go back to a date because you know from the first book
[5:05]I've kept a journal since I was in the seventh grade
[5:08]Maybe because I was like, I know I'm gonna be in the movie star and I'm gonna meet my book
[5:13]And then my shrink when I got in she reminded me she said you didn't know you were saving your life
[5:21]Wiring it all down. Well, and and I was I don't think I'd have made it if I
[5:27]Because I checked my life
[5:29]Something in me knew something was wrong
[5:32]But it becomes such a habit that the depression the crying at night
[5:37]Think of everybody cried in my 20s. I was on Broadway
[5:41]What could be wrong?
[5:43]I told you in the book in the first book. It was a performance. I made a performance out of it
[5:48]I would look in there with those tears and say what's wrong
[5:52]You're on Broadway. What's wrong?
[5:55]I didn't know and have living like that. We know it's sex addiction and everything
[6:00]So it's good to be here and and have done the work I stayed in therapy about 20 years
[6:06]Well, twice a week. I've got the tools now
[6:10]I don't let too much get on me. I just lost my phone
[6:13]And it was such a stress bill and I tried to retract myself and instead of panicking I wrote a song
[6:20]Amazing Jenny calmed down. It's just the phone come on Jenny calm down. Oh
[6:28]It's just the phone you go back AT&T you get another one shut the fuck
[6:35]I'm going
[6:37]That I don't do that shit anymore. I'm far too medicated anyway
[6:43]But it won't let me do it. I'd be like, why can't I kill that bitch?
[6:47]It's your product and your god damn whatever that other ship like McDonald that stopped you some kill
[6:53]Thank god. I want to say one thing else. I saw the documentary on
[6:59]Living Lee
[7:01]It was bipolar
[7:02]You know, they used to literally take her off the gun with the wind set to like in a straight tack
[7:09]I did not know that. Oh, no, she was fucking and
[7:14]Then they interviewed a friend of hers in London
[7:17]And she said oh, Vivian would still be with us if well if they had had what the medication in the work that the
[7:26]Research now and that's true. You know when my strengths said you buy I think you might be bipolar
[7:33]I was like, what a bitch by what I'm not like
[7:36]What is that you know
[7:40]But yeah, so that's how grateful I am that they have
[7:45]the treatment now to
[7:48]Treat the mental illness
[7:51]But yeah, Vivian suffered and then she said she called me. We were gonna play cards
[7:57]Brian, I loved it and she said, but I was late to this rainy
[8:02]When I got there when she came in
[8:06]She came in from outside. She just had a sexual twist in the park
[8:12]That's the sex addiction. It comes with Romania
[8:16]That's you know one thing. You mean you spend a lot
[8:21]You rageful
[8:22]God because you don't know where it's coming from
[8:25]But yeah, that that that sex addiction has need to
[8:29]Control, you know when you feel
[8:32]How to control inside you will create that on the outside
[8:37]So we can reflect back to you and you think okay, I'm used to this misery last company you miserable to okay, let's go
[8:43]You know, it's just all it comes together
[8:47]When you go take care of yourself
[8:49]It's not good. I'm on top of the world kid
[8:52]I feel like part of helping others through mental illness is exactly what you're doing in the book here today
[8:59]So many people still I know stick my blah, blah, blah, but people still don't talk about it a lot
[9:04]And they're still afraid and the more you put out there how you're actually feeling the more you can get back in right
[9:10]Every time I debate if I should share something once I do and I get positive things back like it's actually on us
[9:17]To share with other people other women at everybody else so that they can have a place to share back
[9:22]Otherwise like where are you gonna do it?
[9:24]Mm-hmm. I wish you know, I became legal guardian who this is going to be on radio. It's a podcast. So anywhere
[9:32]Podcasts or yeah, there was a kid that I took in, you know
[9:36]My like my cousin's daughter, you know, I would share that I was having so much trouble
[9:43]With her and a boy they both were I think that's why I got and my son. They were so broken
[9:49]Broken open from the things that had happened to them and I shared it with other parents
[9:56]Sure enough everybody's child
[10:00]going through it. The millennials were depressed. They had been raised on the computer. They were
[10:07]watching porn at seven. They never learned manners and morals. And, you know, they were all woke up
[10:16]at maybe 22 with arthritis in their fingers from playing video games, looked up at their mother
[10:23]mother and father and went, wait a minute. Fuck that my childhood go. You are going to take care of
[10:29]me, right? Those little shits. So I've been really, but it's awful. We all have to take responsibility
[10:37]for what happens to these kids. You set them in front of the TV so you could do this and do that.
[10:43]You've set, you let them be on those video games. You left them be on the internet. So yeah,
[10:49]take care of them now. Don't send them out into the world so selfish. That's the most selfish
[10:56]little, they are little shits. God bless them. I love them. And I do zip behind the laddie. I try to
[11:03]take care of them. But when they get real bad, I said, how do you got to go? Fuck out of here.
[11:09]Not that line stealing. What? You got to go. And I tell a lot of people. You reach out.
[11:19]Go and reach out to that cousin that's naked on the picnic table. But you give him,
[11:26]go get him three by three times. If you love him, give him about three times. And then maybe
[11:32]keep it moving. You can't change anybody. And, you know, you can lead the horse to the
[11:38]waters can make him drink. So let it go. Let people live, allow them to do what they want to do.
[11:44]I say, you know what my saying is, let the children live. Other people's happiness,
[11:50]ain't none of your business. Because you can't make them happy.
[11:55]True. It's hard to accept reality like that. But, you know what I mean? I'll call it like I see it.
[12:02]Jennifer, can we talk about your relationship? I loved reading about how your first meeting at
[12:10]the gym developed with this man developed despite your better judgment. You finally opened
[12:17]up to him and like let the relationship begin, started introducing him to all your friends.
[12:22]Like really got invested. And then that that that I don't want to give anything away.
[12:27]Well, here's the thing. Here's the thing.
[12:29]Wasn't paying attention running off to send 11,000 seniors off into the world.
[12:36]My armamento president of the college called and said, we want to honor you with the doctorate.
[12:44]I was silent. And I said, Dr. Strogo, can I just call you my bag? I need a moment.
[12:51]So she was depending on me to deliver a good speech.
[12:55]I wanted her to be proud of me. I was writing that speech. I wasn't paying attention at
[13:00]asshole. It's still still bad. But I'll tell you, he was as good at what he does as I am
[13:08]with what I do. He'd been doing this as he was 15 years old. He was a fucking pro. I don't know if
[13:14]you saw a tender swindler, but he did it by the book. All of it may be seal for Christ. The fuck
[13:22]was wrong with me. I believed it. I was reading it with you. I was right there. I was,
[13:27]I was blonde. I will. Yeah. But you know, I, I asked for it. He was brilliant. He really was,
[13:34]but it wasn't more brilliant to me because it got caught. She asshole. He'd been in an
[13:39]out of jail. So he never really, he was good. My time he got to me was 52. And he knew it.
[13:45]Exactly what he was doing. And he had researched me on the internet. He knew all of my
[13:51]buttons. He knew I love children. Now, let, oh, I said this in the book. When he said,
[13:59]Carrie Grant was his favorite actor. I should have clocked. I should have clocked. And the only time
[14:07]I had told somebody that was in an interview years ago, that son of a bitch went back into my history.
[14:15]Studied me and made his move. God damn. When I saw my court, I looked at him. I think I was in
[14:23]the book. I said, do you know you fucked with the wrong girl, right? kept the private eye. I won't
[14:28]give it away. But fucking, he said, I can't say that. Anyway, came out great. And the part where I
[14:35]had to give it to the public. My shrink actually tried to do a little reverse psychology on me. I
[14:42]wanted to kill her for it. But she said to me, you know, Jennifer, you don't have to give this
[14:46]to the press. This was personal. It gives so much. So think about it. Maybe she meant that.
[14:56]She did, I think. But still, she knew better. I can't not help when I saw how much
[15:05]pain I was in at the disbelief of it all. I lived a strum down front of the street.
[15:13]I should have seen it. But I told her. I said, you know, damn well, I gotta give it back. If I'm in
[15:19]this much pain, what other women must suffer. I have tools to work through this. And I'll get better.
[15:28]But I had to give it up because he was loose in the world. And I knew he would get another one.
[15:33]I want to know what some of the tools are. Teach me a tool.
[15:36]Oh, journaling. I mean, if my therapist told me I'd save my life by writing every day. I mean,
[15:43]I wrote every day when I wrote the mother black Hollywood, which is my memoir in the first book.
[15:49]I had to read 67 journals and get those details out of there. I could tell you what I ate,
[15:58]you know, 1979 after school. What was your snack? We had ice cream and we went down there
[16:06]which shouldn't happen. I stole a sponge cake out of Mr. Miller's store today. I hope nobody
[16:17]tells my mama. It was all there. But it still wasn't easy to write. Now, I will give you this.
[16:26]And this is so deep. I got so mad at God after that son of a bitch came into my life. I said,
[16:31]you've sinned. I went down to Venice Beach. You sinned. Me. I thought I'd be honest.
[16:38]And I stayed mad a long time. So, well, the journaling is first and it's the most important
[16:47]because like she said, that journaling saved your life. The other tool besides journaling is
[16:53]keep your ass in therapy. Check it in. You know, go if you're something dumb shit happens.
[16:59]It's somebody you love dies and you fucked up. No, don't go. Check in. Don't fall apart.
[17:07]Stay alive for God's sake. There's too many of the living dead right around and around here.
[17:13]Right after COVID. People are so, they don't even know how in shock fail.
[17:19]The world is morning. So, every time I get a stress appeal, I try to think it's COVID, Jenny. Don't do it.
[17:27]You know, the food is going to be slower. The waiter is not going to move it fast.
[17:33]Stop all that privilege shit. Stop it. It's no growth son and you can pick it out of your car.
[17:42]Oh, we've got to, I mean, I even things like, I think I said it, 157 flavors of ice cream,
[17:50]you Americans and you stand there for an hour trying to figure out which one you want.
[17:56]And then you get, you always just go back to vanilla. You get your vanilla cone and then you're
[18:03]licked on it on your way to storm the Capitol. I'm like, what the fuck? What did you just do?
[18:10]And then I saw one thing with some, some white man was up there tall and had a shirt,
[18:16]you know, and he went, oh, let's go get some ass. I was like, what fucking century is this?
[18:26]I'll leave the ball with space. You son of a bit. Just be nice.
[18:32]I've been all over the world. Just got back from India and saw that shit. That's not in the book
[18:38]because I actually was still writing the book in Cambodia. I took a trip around the world. I
[18:43]get on this private jet and I go around the world when I get a month off. I have to hit,
[18:48]you know, everybody, you know, it's exhausting and it's, but you're always yearning for the next
[18:55]until you were just got back from Cambodia and called white. Nepal, Kathmandu took a helicopter
[19:06]through the Himalayan mountains. So I ever saw an average little girl from Kenwak, Missouri,
[19:15]and then to Ahkra, India, the Taj Mahal. I told my mother when I was 13, I'm going to get married
[19:22]at the Taj Mahal, you know, all those big dreams, the mania, the delusions of grandeur that comes
[19:29]with that mania. We don't say we're going to get married, you know, that little church over there.
[19:37]Give me the Taj Mahal bitch. You know, there are that ego, the motherfucker when you want to,
[19:44]when you're having an episode. So anyway, after India was Abu Dhabi, the grand mask,
[19:53]it's like, are you kidding me? Look, but it was such a, you know, it's a forward-thinking country.
[20:00]I forgave them for the ornateness and the ocular.
[20:04]Oh, my God, damn it.
[20:06]And I knew it was the oil of fire.
[20:09]It's so beautiful.
[20:11]Every inch of it, precision.
[20:14]It is the modern day, ockaward.
[20:17]And then the helicopter's over the by to see the islands,
[20:21]the palm island and the crown island.
[20:25]Oh, we played the camo polo in Dubai at the polo club.
[20:30]It's also popular.
[20:31]But you know, when you're celebrity,
[20:33]I can only travel like that.
[20:34]I can't go shlacking around the world by myself.
[20:38]And one last place, Jordan, Petra,
[20:45]that was just a mind fuck.
[20:48]I'll be hard that thing, you know what I did there?
[20:52]Because they weren't watching dancing with the stars.
[20:57]I ain't go what was built because they didn't know the Kardashians.
[21:02]What are we, huh?
[21:04]OK.
[21:05]And then we were supposed to go to Sicily.
[21:08]No, baby, I'm talking about Sicily.
[21:10]Her name is Sicily.
[21:11]She thought I was calling her.
[21:13]That's so good.
[21:14]We were supposed to go to Sicily.
[21:17]And there was a COVID breakout on the jet.
[21:20]Oh, no.
[21:22]They let a woman back on there that had tested positive.
[21:26]And because she got a negative, they put it back.
[21:28]And the doctor that we traveled with came over,
[21:31]I said, don't patronize me.
[21:35]Don't you dare.
[21:36]Y'all don't know nothing about this fucking thing.
[21:39]Positive negative, negative parts of the day.
[21:41]And I said, if she had those symptoms two days ago,
[21:46]and now she done tested negative.
[21:48]And you let her back on this fucking plane.
[21:51]And I said, you guys were supposed to kill me.
[21:54]What's wrong with you?
[21:56]So I came home.
[21:57]I missed Sicily.
[21:59]I told her.
[22:00]I took a three hour drive across the Jordanian desert.
[22:04]I stayed at the four seasons, made them pay for it.
[22:08]I had a six-hand massage that night.
[22:10]Baby, if you ever go to our mom, you go to that four seasons.
[22:15]I'd never seen one like that.
[22:17]It was so everything.
[22:19]And you go, I've been around the world.
[22:21]I've stayed at every, every under it.
[22:24]Four seasons, and I'm on Georgia.
[22:26]I mean, Georgia tore me up, took a flight back to JFK.
[22:30]I'm so happy to get home.
[22:31]Because that wasn't going to wear a mask on a private jet,
[22:34]bitch, I met you money, that shit caused.
[22:37]Why did you let her back there?
[22:38]I said, she must have been the CEO's cousin of some shit.
[22:42]You sacrificed everybody on everything.
[22:45]No, I'm not standing.
[22:47]They were so sad.
[22:47]I left because you know, I bring them party.
[22:49]It's like, fuck all you Republicans say, Atlanta.
[22:51]All right, so anyway.
[22:54]Jennifer, I have another question for you.
[22:56]Okay, I'm sorry, I will go on with the story, girl.
[22:59]I promise I will.
[23:00]What's happening?
[23:01]What's your last guess?
[23:02]My last question for you after everything you've gone through
[23:06]and being a celebrity and having people
[23:09]mistreat you like this guy.
[23:11]How do you know who to trust?
[23:14]That's a very interesting question.
[23:16]How do I know who to trust?
[23:20]Mm.
[23:22]I'll tell you something about myself.
[23:25]That's the calm artist.
[23:28]So shit like that happens to you.
[23:29]You wake the fuck up and have a thing I say to myself.
[23:34]Check, check, don't check, Jenny.
[23:37]I'd do a background on every motherfucker I say,
[23:40]good morning to my background.
[23:42]I'd give my good fuck all you know.
[23:46]Don't tell me how to find out.
[23:48]I'm not that, but anybody that comes close very close
[23:51]like facilities new and then do background check.
[23:55]You little thief, what you still?
[23:56]But you know, she grabbed me.
[24:01]I found out she had a, what was it?
[24:03]The speeding ticket or something shit?
[24:04]No.
[24:05]There's a waste of fucking money.
[24:06]I shouldn't all look blonde by a girl.
[24:08]I ain't did too much shit in the world.
[24:10]And what are you, 12?
[24:12]She didn't know 20s.
[24:13]But yeah, I checked double, I don't let anybody
[24:16]new in my life anymore.
[24:18]I got enough friends.
[24:19]I'm 65.
[24:20]I get the fuck out of here.
[24:21]I'm with a new friend.
[24:22]And I trust myself more.
[24:26]Like I said, I just sang that little happy song.
[24:30]And got that stress off me.
[24:32]I walked the walker now.
[24:35]I greet everybody with joy.
[24:36]That's why I named the book that.
[24:38]Hey, how you know?
[24:40]People been asking me for pictures all day,
[24:42]even though I put shit in front of my face.
[24:44]They just see the afro.
[24:45]And of course, I'm in bright yellow.
[24:46]How can I be missed?
[24:49]But I give everybody a picture.
[24:52]If I tell them, stand there and I'll
[24:53]get in the back for COVID.
[24:55]But I can't say no.
[24:57]These are the people who pay my mortgage.
[25:00]These are the people who have watched me over the years.
[25:05]These are the people you give a picture.
[25:08]You be nice.
[25:09]And I tell my other slapdays.
[25:11]But I found everybody had a camera.
[25:14]I said, you know, I want to give a picture.
[25:16]Keep your fucking ass at home.
[25:19]Most people just, they just want a picture.
[25:22]I know I'll say no to anybody.
[25:24]I say this, and this is my last sentence.
[25:27]I'm an alpha.
[25:28]I don't care if it's an earthquake, which I talked about
[25:31]in my black Hollywood.
[25:33]I had to kick down $7.
[25:35]I don't care what's going on.
[25:38]I will leave no man behind any fucking thing.
[25:42]What do you need here?
[25:43]I got everything I wanted.
[25:45]I know how it feels to be poor, like, desperate.
[25:49]That's what makes me who I am.
[25:52]That's extra from nothing, from nothing, literally,
[25:57]to everything I've ever wanted, to show you something.
[26:01]I'm sure you're the same.
[26:03]I saw, I posted it.
[26:06]I was like, look at this.
[26:07]I'm at a regular, I can't wait.
[26:08]Can you leave it?
[26:09]Can you leave it?
[26:10]Sunday styles are awesome.
[26:12]I opened two, four pages in the sun.
[26:15]That's not any day time.
[26:18]Now I've been in the times many times.
[26:20]I have not, to just stop fucking good.
[26:26]Fuck that digital shit, too.
[26:28]Let me see that shit in mind.
[26:31]I'm all school, fuck you in your digital shit.
[26:34]Kids ain't no number watching porn.
[26:36]People ain't doing.
[26:37]Everybody's fucking fucking, they're bad,
[26:39]but me and their shit gives me a headache.
[26:40]And then watch their shit.
[26:42]Okay, last night.
[26:43]But listen, get out of your zippy.
[26:47]I leave no man behind, little girl.
[26:49]You hear me?
[26:51]That's who you're talking to.
[26:53]You're amazing.
[26:54]That was the most entertaining half an hour.
[26:57]I think I've ever spent.
[26:58]I feel like I just got a personal performance
[27:02]of like the best show ever.
[27:04]Thank you, you're amazing.
[27:06]That's lasting.
[27:07]Yeah.
[27:08]When you say I'm amazing,
[27:10]has to be in you to see it in me.
[27:14]I get out of here.
[27:14]You get numb and you're gone.
[27:16]It's funny.
[27:17]I'm like, let me eat.
[27:18]Hey, don't you?
[27:19]Hey, I'm confused.
[27:20]Goodbye.
[27:21]Your name, Joe.
[27:23]Bye.
[27:24]Thank you all.
[27:24]Your name's Joe.
[27:25]Get it out of here.
[27:26]Bye, baby.
[27:27]Bye.
[27:28]Bye, bye.
[27:29]Bye, bye, bye.
[27:31]Thanks for listening to this episode of Moms.
[27:33]Don't have time to read books.
[27:34]Don't forget to follow me on Instagram,
[27:36]adsuby Owens, and at Moms.
[27:38]Don't have time to read books.
[27:39]Also sign up for my newsletter adsuby Owens.com
[27:42]and sign up for my virtual book club
[27:43]and meet lots of authors on Zoom every other week.
[27:46]Thanks so much to Steve and Ryan at Texturesound
[27:49]for the Sound Editing.
[27:50]And thank you to Morning Moon Productions
[27:52]for providing this fantastic intro and outro music.