Mallory Weggemann, LIMITLESS

[1:20]Zibby Owens: This is Zippy Owens, and you're listening to the award winning podcast, Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books. I'm also the host of Moms Don't Have Time to Lose Weight, and I'm the editor of the anthology, which you should run out and buy, called Moms Don't Have Time to A Quarantine Anthology. All proceeds of that book go to COVID nineteen vaccine research. And I'm the editor in chief of Moms Don't Have Time to Write a New Publication on Medium, and we're accepting submissions, so please send your personal essays there. And if all that isn't enough, you can follow me on Instagram at Zibby Owens, and my website is zibbyowens.com. Okay, now back to this amazing podcast. Mallory Wegemann is the author of The Power of Hope and Resilience to Overcome Circumstance. Mallory is a record setting two time Paralympic swimmer for Team USA. She has set 15 world records and 34 American records and is also the recipient of an ESPY award, a 15 time world champion and a Paralympic gold and bronze medalist. Wegman has also served as a commentator on NBC for the PyeongChang twenty eighteen Paralympic Games, the first female reporter in a wheelchair ever to serve in that capacity. Weggemann has established herself as a leader outside of the pool as well. She is an inclusion advocate serving on the advisory board of disability for Delta Airlines, as well as a co founder and CEO of TFA Group, a social impact agency and production studio. A highly sought after motivational speaker, Wegman has presented at numerous Fortune 500 companies, including Bank of America, Morgan Stanley, Comcast, PepsiCo, Northwestern Mutual, Aetna, Accenture, Delta Airlines, and Deloitte. Her book was amazing. Welcome, Mallory. Thank you so, so much for coming on Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books. I am beyond inspired by your story and your personality and everything. I just I can't wait to talk to you. So thank you for coming to talk about Limitless. Well, thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to be here. Wow. Okay. So for people who aren't familiar with your story of how why don't you give a synopsis of sort of what happened and how you have overcome so much? And then we'll talk all about the book and but give give like the basics if you don't mind.

[3:36]Mallory Weggemann: Yeah. Yeah. The the overview. The overview. Took the long story short, but there's really no really short version of it. So I was when I was 18 years old, I had just graduated high school in June 2007. And in January 2008, I went in for what was to be my third and final epidural injection for back pain. And unfortunately, to complications from the procedure that day, I was left paralyzed as a result of the procedure. And I think of 01/21/2008, it was Monday, Martin Luther King Jr. Day. And I had the day off from class. And so that was kind of why we decided we were gonna do it that day because it was just a quick day procedure. I'd be home by afternoon and I'd be back at class Tuesday morning. And that day has kind of since been marked as what I've called my sudden moment of impact. And for me, it was that unforeseen moment. There was no even forewarning. There was no idea on the radar that that was something that could happen that day. It was very kind of simple matter of fact. Walk in, come home in the afternoon, go back to life next morning. And everything but that occurred. And so, at 18, two months before my nineteenth birthday, was kind of left at this crossroad of figuring out life and what was living as an individual with a spinal cord injury going to look like not just for tomorrow, but for my future tomorrows as you string them together. And that was really overwhelming and incredibly challenging. There was a lot of hurt and frustration and anger that stemmed from that day and the events that occurred. I look at that time in my life there's kind of two moments that stick out so significantly for me. One was my first night home from the hospital. And my parents were still working on creating an accessible room for me in the lower level of their home. And so my dad carried me upstairs to my bedroom and my mom got my things settled up there. As we got settled and they said goodnight and they left the room, it was just me left in the same room that I walked out of six weeks prior. And that room looked the same as when I left it. I still had my books on my desk for spring semester, my clothes that were kind of just shoved in my closet because I didn't wanna do laundry that weekend. Remnants of a life that really wasn't all that in the distant past, but felt like an entire lifetime ago with the situation I was in. And I realized that night that probably one of the most profound things I was gonna have to do on this journey is the most simple thing. And that was make the choice each morning if I'm going to get out of bed or if I'm going to stay in bed. And it sounds maybe a bit ridiculous, but laying in bed that night and seeing my wheelchair beside it and understanding the gravity of what I was facing, I realized that come morning, had that, I had a choice. I could stay there and I could grieve and I could feel sorry for myself rightfully so after what had happened, or I could get myself into my chair and slowly kind of figure out getting myself dressed that morning on my own and doing the little things that I could do and then open that door and lean on my parents and my sisters and my community to help me piece the rest of the puzzle back together. And I knew that that decision was going to set pace not just for what I would do the next day, but what I would do in the following week and the month and years later. And that that choice was about something so much more of like, what am I going to do tomorrow? And that was a really big pace that I set when I chose that next morning to get out of bed and get into my wheelchair and start to fight. And that doesn't mean that every day since has been graceful. It's been thirteen years. And and there's days like yesterday where, frankly, being paralyzed is really hard. And then there's days and weeks and months where I don't even think twice about it because it's just what I know now. But I look to that journey and that kind of moment in my life where I had to make that decision. And I'm so grateful for what I've learned these past thirteen years because I am who I am as a result of that day. It didn't define me, but it was very much a part of the fabric of my being. Wow. Wait. So what happened yesterday? Oh, it was just some days it's just hard. Know, you're I was sore from training. My arms were just shot and it felt like everything I tried to do was, you know, when you don't have the use of your legs and you use your arms for everything and you're an athlete who's not gentle on your body, some days the really hard training catches up to you and it's like, you forget how much you need those until everything's just a little slower because you're super sore from training. And it's just, honestly, it's those silly little reminders where it's like, the normal task takes you a little bit longer. You're dropping things because you're kind of just moving different because you're sore from the workout the previous day. It's not always big things. It's just those little reminders of like, gosh, it would be a lot easier if I could just stand up right now. And then sometimes it's more based on the perception that gets put on me of others when I leave the door of my home, right? So like every day it's kind of a moving target, but like I said, there's also weeks and months where I can go and

[9:24]Zibby Owens: it's like, don't even think twice about it because this is just what my life is now. Wow. First of all, just the attitude alone, I feel like should earn you some sort of medal. But the fact that in addition to approaching your life the way you did after this incident, life changing, forever changing incident, you also happen to become a Paralympic athlete and, like, award winning, amazing, accomplished warrior athlete as well. And, like, you just googled Paralympics after like, not even that long after you had been injured and were like, what's this? And, like, walked into this pool room and like hit by the chlorine and next thing you know, you're like winning medals all over and training thirteen years later or whatever. Like, tell me a little more about that. I mean, it's one thing to get out of bed. It's another thing to get back in the pool and all of that.

[10:20]Mallory Weggemann: It is. And it's interesting because one led to the other. Right? And think that that's such an important thing for us to realize is the idea of getting in the pool after becoming paralyzed might seem daunting to most people, but it, and while it was fairly abrupt, it was two and a half months later, those little things that we do each day kind of give you that courage within to tackle that bigger thing, right? And so I had been each day kind of tackling that new little thing of, okay, I'm gonna do this today for myself. I'm gonna get dressed 100% on my own today. Not gonna have help no matter how long it takes me. Just those really quite frankly, little things that became the big things in my life. But when I learned about swimming again, everything changed. And it was interesting because it was complete chance. I mean, it was the first Saturday in April in two thousand and eight. I was now settled in my room downstairs. I wheeled into my family's kitchen and my oldest sister, I have two older sisters, my oldest one was home. And she was reading our local newspaper here in the twin cities. And there was an article about the two thousand and eight Beijing Paralympic trials for swimming and they're being held at the University of Minnesota. And admittedly at that point in our lives, my family and I really didn't know about the Paralympic movement. We didn't know about adaptive sport. Wasn't something that crossed our radar. And when you're injured, unfortunately more often than not, you're kind of met with here's the way your life is gonna be drastically different and all the things to expect and it's kind of doom and gloom admittedly. And no one's really kind of meeting you with that safety net of saying, but here's how you can adapt and still go to college and finish your degree and sports a part of your life, remain an active lifestyle and all of those various things. And so at that point, just had this really closed mindset of what I thought living with a disability was going to be because I didn't know any better. And when we learned about the Paralympic movement, it was like this whole world was opened up. For those previous few months, I felt like now as an individual with a physical disability, I was physically incapable of doing things, which sure, I can't put one foot in front of the other, but outside of that, that idea is completely and utterly untrue. And so when we learned about the Paralympic movement, it really solidified the idea that really anything is possible in terms of what I could desire for my future. And so we ended up going to the pool that night, my sister and I, with a lot of family persuasion. I didn't really wanna go admittedly. It was snowing in Minnesota, go figure. And I was kinda like, nah, I'm good. And so we did end up going. And when we got to the pool, I I wheeled in, and and there's a railing along the right when you come in the doors before you go into the seating in the natatorium. And I looked over the railing to the pool deck, And I think that was the first moment that I felt hope since my injury. Like like not the fake it till you make it. If you smile enough, you'll get through this really crappy time in your life and, you know, you kinda fool yourself into believing you're okay. But I actually felt hope. And it wasn't about the idea that I thought I was gonna go become a Paralympic champion. That was not on my radar at all at the time. It was more so that I looked to a pool deck and I saw people that I saw myself in. And for the previous few months, everywhere I turned, I felt like I was on an island alone. I didn't see a path forward. I didn't see people I could see myself in when I wheeled out the doors of my home and into our society. I didn't see others in stores or advertisements or media or entertainment. It was just me. And that was really tough. And that notion of it's hard to become what you don't see became very real in my life. And so when I looked to that pool deck, I saw possibility. I saw opportunity. I saw a path forward. And I ended up back on that pool deck forty eight hours later with my dad and I got back in the water for the first time just two days later. And swimming in that black line that trails the bottom of the pool in so many ways saved me. And it's what allowed me to start piecing my life back together. And then eventually I got that competitive itch just like I had when I was a seven year old kid going to the sport for the first time. I realized that that was where I was my truest self. And so that's where I turned to heal. Wow.

[15:20]Zibby Owens: That's amazing. You had this quote where you said, I could not will my legs to move. I just wrote this on a little sticky because I read this on the computer. I could not will my legs to move, but I could wake up each morning and fight knowing that I had parents and sisters who were rooting for me, praying for me, and fighting for me. And you had this whole part of the book about how you have to accept help and how it's all a team and the amazing support of your family who, by the way, I wanna like bow down and be like, you are amazing. Like, I like love your your family and how like good overcomes and all the ways they've obviously made you into this wonderful person, but the goodness that comes out of them. Tell me a little more about how you all kind of had to band together and especially on the heels of your sister's illness and the trauma that you all had gotten through after she had had near death experience and how you could rally and even find the humor and, you know, racing on the ground when your sister like stole away your wheelchair and all of that.

[16:22]Mallory Weggemann: You know, I I think that it's such an important thing to learn. We We all hear and understand the sentiment that we are stronger together in numbers. But I think once it's actually had to play up in your life and you see it to be true, that's a whole different thing, right? And so early on, I had, like I said, the love of my parents and my sisters and our community. And I knew that those people not only were gonna bring color to my life, but give me strength and be that safety net if you will, to allow me to attempt these things as I start to kind of learn how to put the pieces together, but also have a place to fall because it's inevitable, right? When we're learning, we stumble, we fall, we get back up, we stumble, we fall, we get back up. Like it's just kind of this back and forth game a little bit. And now all these years later, look and I have my husband added to that mix and I have other incredible individuals who've come into the fold. And I think it's just one of the many things that I would say I'm very grateful for in this journey, especially that it happened at such a young age for me and perspective to life, because I learned at a very young age that we aren't meant to do this alone. Asking for help does not make us weak. It's honestly probably the strongest thing that we can do. And whether that's in my career as an athlete, chase down my third Paralympic Games or whether that's just in my life as an individual, as a daughter, as a sister, as a friend, as a wife, or as a businesswoman, like asking for help is so vital and understanding that, yes, I am fiercely independent and I'm stubborn as they come, I'll be the first to admit it. And when I was a kid, everything was I do it. And even as an adult, there's a lot of I do it, like I got this, I'm good. But understanding that we do it is just as important, if not more. And I think what gives us the strength to have that fierce independence is knowing that it's backed by the support of a community. And so when you put those two things together, honestly, that's a remarkable combination. And whether it's triumph, whether it's adversity and loss and trauma, whatever it is, or just a random Tuesday, community and the people in your life, they're everything. They're they're what makes the gold medal moments worth it. They're what catch you when the January twenty first two thousand eights happened, and they're what bring light to the in between. And I think that that is something important. And And I think that we naturally as humans, we struggle with saying I need help. Like we somehow think that that means we're less than or we're weak or we're incapable. But as I said, I truly do believe it's probably one of the strongest things we can do. Wow.

[19:28]Zibby Owens: You also said in the book that, and I guess this is an expression that your mom used to say to you, but God never wastes a pain, which I love. I mean, tell me how you interpret that and how that's sort of been a guiding light, how you've turned your pain into such a gift for other people and into something so inspiring.

[19:50]Mallory Weggemann: You know, I think every experience we face in life is for a purpose, even the hard ones. And I am a better person because of 01/21/2008. I am a better person because of 03/05/2014, which is the day of my arm injury that unfortunately has been a second permanent injury in my life. I am a better person because of those days and the journeys that they've carried me through. And we all are, I mean, if you look at just this past year alone, it has been so incredibly challenging for all of us in very different ways, but shared by a common experience. We've all faced loss to some level this year, hardship, we've all faced, even if losses as simple as right now in 2021, life is not what you thought it was gonna be at this stage in early twenty twenty. You had different plans that haven't been able to play out because of everything that's happened. Well, that's not physical loss in the sense that we all traditionally talk about loss. That is a loss in way for us and what we thought our future would carry. And it's okay to say that that's hard. And I think that when we look at those challenging times in our lives, it's important that we don't kind of guilt our way through of like, we need to find a silver lining like that and we don't get to experience the pain that comes with those moments. But I also think it's important to realize that through those seasons, through the adversity that we face in our lifetime, we ultimately grow into better people as a result of them. We are better people because of this past year. We have experienced things maybe we never thought we would experience and that is making us stronger for what is to come in our future. And 01/21/2008 in my life and months and years that followed, I am better for that. And I am more rooted in what my purpose is and who I want to be and my values and perspective because of that season of my life. And I think it's really important to realize that no matter how dark it might feel there is always something good that comes on the other side. Even if that something good is carved by pain it could be simply appreciating the simple moments more because you've unfortunately had to learn firsthand how much they are to be cherished and how they're not irreplaceable and how tomorrow's not guaranteed. That's a really hard lesson to have to learn firsthand and a heartbreak that nobody should have to know. But to some element, there's also a beauty in being able to live a life with that perspective of being able to enjoy those moments in a way that you never did before. Today's episode is sponsored by Quince.

[22:51]Zibby Owens: Summer always makes me rethink what I'm reaching for every day. Lighter fabrics, better materials, pieces that just feel good the moment you put them on and look effortless. That's why I keep coming back to Quince. They focus on high quality essentials. Think breathable linen, soft organic cotton, washable silk, but without the luxury markup. It's that rare balance where everything feels elevated but still easy. Quint's has beautiful everyday pieces like 100% European linen pants, dresses, and tops with styles starting at $32. Their denim is soft and easy to wear. I wear my jean jacket all the time. And their organic cotton sweaters are perfect for layering on cool summer nights. Everything at Quince is priced 50 to 80% less than similar brands. Quince works directly with ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen, so you're paying for quality, not brand markup. It's not just clothing. Quince has really become a destination for elevated essentials across home, kitchen, bedding, and beyond, making it easy to bring a more premium feel into everyday life. In addition to my jean jacket, I recently got a white tank top dress with a beautiful cotton skirt that is absolutely gorgeous, and I can't wait for it to be warm enough so I can wear it every day, but it has been a cool spring. Elevate your summer wardrobe. Go to quince.com/zippy for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty five day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's quince.com/zippy for free shipping and three hundred and sixty five day returns. Quince.com/zibby.

[25:03]Mallory Weggemann: For. And so I think that, you know, that's where I find that strength from of understanding that 01/21/2008 wasn't just for nothing. And it's helped give me purpose moving forward. And it's helped give me closure to that day and understand that it is not my defining factor. It's a part of me, but it does not define me or who I am to become.

[25:28]Zibby Owens: And is writing the book part of sharing? Because I feel like your story and what you've learned and this, like, realization of this change that took over you and this appreciation of life and the it's like you've seen through all the the mess and found the what is important and you wanna shout it from the rooftops. Right? That this message that people are often too busy or distracted to even see. And you have this, like, crystal clear vision of it and you wanna shout it from the rooftops. Is that how the book came about? And like, how else do you want to spread your message? You know, for me, Limitless,

[26:05]Mallory Weggemann: it came about, and this this might sound a little bit ridiculous, but it came about because I know how much pain 18 year old Mal was in. And I know that the pain that I was in is not, I wasn't on an island alone when it comes to that. That's a very universal feeling. We have all to some extent face that in our lives. We all know the depths, we all know trauma, and loss and adversity and hardship, very intimately. And I wanted to share my story in a way that could help empower others to find that light within themselves, to help empower others to understand that there now does not define what's to become and empower them to find their limitless potential within. Because to me, limitless isn't a fluff statement. It's a way of being, it's a way of understanding that the circumstances we carry do not define who we are or what we can become. Only we get to do that. Ensure they factor in. I mean, are inherently things like I am an individual in a wheelchair with no function of my legs. It doesn't matter how much I channel my inner limitless spirit, I'm not going to walk. Like, that is a very factual thing. But I think sometimes we make that idea so literal that we don't step back and realize, yeah, but limitless or that holistic healing, if you will, is about something so much more than one foot in front of the other in my situation or whatever that could be for you. It's about who we choose to be in those moments. And so I think that for me and limitless really came to life because I did. Mean, I have it spelled out in thirteen years of journals as I've worked through this. Was in a lot of pain early on and I knew that wasn't as I grew that that was not a uncommon territory for people. That's something unfortunately we can all relate on. And so I wanted to share my story in a way that wasn't just chronologically telling it, but also sharing what I learned throughout and pulling that out and really empowering others to find that in themselves.

[28:36]Zibby Owens: And I think that's my biggest hope for Limitless is that I can empower other individuals to find their light and honor their journey so they can lean into their limitless potential. I mean, some people just writing the book would be a huge challenge. For you, it's like, oh, just like throw that on the list of you know, on your to do list for the day. So what was it like? I mean, you're a really great writer on top of everything else. Tell me about the process of writing this and everything from, like, the cover design to, you know, the how long it took? Like, what was the book writing process like? Did you collaborate with somebody else? Like, what was it like?

[29:12]Mallory Weggemann: So first of all, I I very much anchored myself in in teen jackets when it comes to how you display your books on a bookshelf after going through the book process. Designing a book cover and realizing how much thought goes into it. I mean, it makes sense, but you just don't always know what you don't know until you go through it and you don't always appreciate it. And I was like, I will never take a book cover off a book ever again. They will forever stay on. And it was so much fun to go through those details. I mean, yes, there's the writing, but even just understanding and respecting the craft that goes into putting a book out into the world. It is remarkable. Talk about teams and communities. I mean, the team that I was so fortunate to have surround me, absolutely remarkable human beings and limitless is limitless because of those people. And I had an amazing co writer, Tiffany Yucky Brooks, and she was my mentor and my teacher and like my safe place to fall when we were rehashing some of the most challenging moments in my life. And I think what was so incredible about how we wrote Limitless is I love to write and I always have, but I also knew I didn't know how to do that when it came to a book and I really needed her guidance through that. But yet she also really empowered me where there were some chapters where she was like, take it away, Mal. And it was just me and a blank Word document. And there was a lot of that that went on. I appreciate that because we really created a co writing environment versus having her just kind of attempt to go after it in my story. And and I I really appreciate that she as a cowriter gave me that trust and and freedom with my story to to do that in in a way that allowed my voice to really shine through in limitless. And I'm I'm so proud of what we've created with that. And from the writing process, you know, it was fast. Limitless came together. From what I've heard fast. I mean, was my first, it's my first book. So I just don't know what I don't know. But we started writing in January and we were final and turned in in June with the first 11 chapters turned in in May. And we got a month for that final chapter because due to COVID, the ending was different. It wasn't gonna end how chapter 12 ends. And there's almost a little bit of a beauty in that. I mean, as we were writing and everything started to come to light with what we are facing in our world with COVID. And I realized we're gonna have to re figure out how we want to end limitless. And I just kind of sat back with my husband and chuckled of like, of course we are, because that's how this story has gone. Like being paralyzed at 18 is not how we plan things to go. And you go on down the line and it's filled with all of these kind of detours and curveballs of things we didn't plan. It only seems fitting that the ending of the book is following that same path. And so we really took space for that. And I think one of the biggest blessings for me was from January to March, I was writing while training for Tokyo. And trials were supposed to be in June 2020 when my manuscript was due. And so I was going to be training for Tokyo, traveling as a speaker and writing. And while I had Tiffany and she was remarkable, I think I finally realized in March when everything kind of started shut down and I lost access to training, we still had a lot to write come March. And it was a little eye opening, but at the same time, it gave me the space to step back from training and just sit surrounded by thirteen years of journals and really lean into those. And I allowed them to guide me in how I wrote Limitless. The chapters are all pulled together from lessons that I learned during that point of my journey. And they are all pulled out of the journals and themes that I just kept talking about during that time. And that's how the chapter titles came about and how the conversations within the chapters. I mean, it's interesting when we started writing in January 2020, and in a lot of ways, I started writing three days after my paralysis when I picked up my journal in the hospital. And I'm so grateful for that because it allowed me to lean into what was I really going through in that time versus trying to come up with it thirteen years later, hindsight 2020. And I hope, I certainly hope that that vulnerability will be what can help readers connect with it in a in a raw sense. So I loved the writing process. I I would do it over and over and over and over again. And I think that it taught me a lot and it forced me to do ultimately what it is that I hope for Limitless to do. Forced me to step back and read journals that I haven't touched since I turned the page and wrote the next one and really forced me to honor my own journey as well. You know, it's funny you said hindsight is 2020,

[34:40]Zibby Owens: that whole, you know, philosophy, but yet maybe there's something to it that last year when COVID hit, it was 2020. Like, maybe it's just, like, one of those signs. Right? Like like, you can't like, this is all a joke. Any plans you think you're making, forget it. Like, everything is up in the air. Like, you think you see clearly, you don't.

[35:05]Mallory Weggemann: Everything can change. I mean, goodness, when the games were postponed, I would say the hardest part of that for me was we were planning on starting a family this year as a female athlete. As athletes in general in the Olympic and Paralympic movement, your world is planned on these four year quads. But then as a female athlete, as you get older, you can imagine family planning goes into husband and I planned our wedding around Rio and we were planning a family around Tokyo and then everything changed. It was like, guests were waiting again, which one year, it's like, oh, it's not that big of a deal, we will be on our own journey to have kids. It's not as simple as some couples may like. And I know that's a pretty common thing of embarking on fertility journeys, but we'll be doing that. And so you always, when windows get shorter, you always get a little nervous and I don't plan on retiring after Tokyo. So now I have three years till Paris versus four years. So it's like everything condenses and you just, you feel the emotions of 2020 did that to a lot of people. There's a lot of people that were trying for families who were going through infertility treatments and had to stop treatments because clinics shut down. And their long awaited dream to have kids got put on hold again when when it's already been put on hold how many different times or weddings were canceled or postponed graduations missed, loved ones lost without the closure for their family members to be there with them. I mean, the list goes on and I think that a space when we look to 2020 and we now look at where we're at in 2021 to just pause and take it in and let ourselves feel what we need to feel and appreciate what we've learned even if that learning has come through loss and look towards where it is that we're going versus just rushing to say, and I need it to get back to what it was. It's like, well, I I hate for anyone listening to be the bearer of bad news. It's not going to go back to what it was, and it shouldn't go back to what it was. It's like when I was paralyzed, wanted 01/20/2008 all over again. I just wanted life before January 21. But the truth of it is is a, that's just not feasible because we can't change the events of our past. But b, that's not the direction we're supposed to move. We are supposed to, no matter how uncomfortable and how challenging a time is, we are supposed to learn from that and move into who it's building us to become. And I refuse, and this is maybe the optimist in me or maybe it's the growth mindset in me, but I refuse to believe that 2020 was for a waste. And my heart breaks for everybody who faced the ultimate loss in 2020 and 2021. And nobody should have to go through that. But it is also my hope that maybe this year can make us a more compassionate society and force us all to slow down just a brief second to appreciate what it is that we're in and where it is we could go as a result of this versus just rushing to look at past experiences and circumstances as our metric for what should become. I, like, totally went over our time because I am captivated

[38:23]Zibby Owens: listening to you speak seriously amazing. But I always ask this question at the end and I have to hear what you have to say about it. And then I apologize again for going over. You're fine. But what advice would you have to aspiring authors? I feel like this whole thing has been advice for living and and accomplishing your dreams in so many ways, but just anything on that. I think the biggest thing I would say is every single one of us has a story to share.

[38:49]Mallory Weggemann: And if it is your dream to share your story in in between two covers in a book, do it. Even if you literally do it for yourself or for your family, even if it's a story that nobody else ever sees. If that is a dream, literally go for it because I do believe we all have a story to tell and we all have a story to share and they all deserve to be heard. And so I think that that's the that would be my biggest piece of advice because it can be daunting and it can be terrifying. And we're all a little self deprecative and like, why does anyone wanna hear my story? Whether, you know, it's a nonfiction or fictional story, we all kind of go down that rabbit hole because for whatever reason, we see ourselves as so much smaller than we actually are. And I would say just as cheesy as it sounds, get in front of that mirror, give yourself that power pose and literally go do it. Why not? I mean, literally why not? And again, even if it's a story, no one else but you and your dearest loved ones and friends see and read, who cares you're doing it for yourself. And I would say when you get into the process, the biggest piece of advice I would give is once you start writing, anchor yourself in why. Why did you pick up that pen or get on your keyboard in the first place? And carry that with you through every single page because it will guide you in every decision you need to make along the way. Because there's a million and one decisions forks from the creative process that you're gonna come to of, should I do it this way or this way? And if you know why you're writing it, that will guide you. Wow.

[40:40]Zibby Owens: This has been amazing. I am such a fan of yours. I will be following whatever you do going forward. And congratulations on this book. And just thank you for bringing sort of, like, your beautiful perspective into the world. I have so much respect for you, and I'm so glad we got to chat. So thank you. Thank you so much. I really appreciate that. And this was fun. Oh, good. This is really fun. I see your dog in the background. I know. I saw you had a laugh on Instagram.

[41:06]Mallory Weggemann: I saw yours. He's a bulletin. Right? Where's Sam? Yeah. Aw. So cute. I really love her hair in my office for everything. I know she's usually yeah. She's my little

[41:18]Zibby Owens: work friend. She hangs out with me all day.

[41:21]Mallory Weggemann: Love it. I I should I should have actually said I had a second co writer in this guy because he was at my hip literally. Like at night, he'll put himself to bed. But when I was writing, he would stay on the floor at my side in the office till whatever hour of the night I was up till. And it was so funny. Both my husband and I were like, is he really like maybe understand to some element what you're doing? Because generally, he'd be like, I'm out. I'm going to bed. And he was at my side the entire time.

[41:54]Zibby Owens: Dogs know. Well,

[41:57]Mallory Weggemann: was lovely to meet you. Thank you. You. And I hope you and and your family stay stay well as spring spring makes its way around to all of us. Thank you, you too. And if you ever end up in New York, please let me know. I'll have like an event for you or do whatever or you know, something. We will most definitely end up in New York. My husband grew up out east and lived in the city for eight years. So once we are normally there a lot just obviously it's kind of a loaded statement right now.

[42:25]Zibby Owens: Alright. Thanks so much. Alright. Alright. Take care. Bye bye.

[42:41]Zibby Owens: and sign up for my virtual book club and meet lots of authors on Zoom every other week. Thanks so much to Steve and Ryan at Texture Sound for the sound editing, and thank you to Morning Moon Productions for providing this fantastic intro and outro music.